How to disagree productively and find common ground | Julia Dhar
Disagreeing Productively
In this talk, Julia Dhar discusses how public discourse is broken and how we can disagree productively. She shares her experience as a debater and coach to offer a guide on how to engage in structured disagreement that is mutually respectful and assumes a genuine desire to persuade and be persuaded.
The Problem with Public Discourse
- Public discourse is broken.
- Panelists on TV are screaming at each other.
- We are so scared to get into an argument that we're willing not to engage at all.
- Contempt has replaced conversation.
The Power of Debate
- Debate requires engaging with conflicting ideas directly, respectfully, face-to-face.
- Finding common ground is the foundation of debate.
- Rebuttal is the essence of debate; it's what separates it from pontificating.
Disagreeing Productively
- People who disagree the most productively start by finding common ground, no matter how narrow it is.
- Successful persuaders invite us into shared reality by identifying things we can all agree on.
- Debate helps organize conversations about how the world could or should be.
The Importance of Debate
In this section, the speaker discusses the importance of debate and how it can help us engage with controversial ideas.
Benefits of Face-to-Face Debate
- Shared reality provides a platform for discussion.
- Face-to-face debate is more effective than online communication.
- Listening to someone's voice humanizes them and makes it easier to engage with their ideas.
Implementing Structured Debates
- Conferences and team meetings could include structured debates.
- Debating controversial ideas can lead to innovation.
- This idea is easy and free to implement.
Separating Ideas from Identity
- In formal debate, attacking the identity of the person making an argument is irrelevant.
- Engage with the best version of the idea, not the person behind it.
- Our public conversations can be transformed by debating ideas rather than discussing identity.
Humility of Uncertainty
- Debate allows us to open ourselves up to the possibility that we might be wrong.
The Humility of Uncertainty
In this section, the speaker discusses how embracing the humility of uncertainty can make us better decision-makers. People who practice intellectual humility are more capable of evaluating evidence objectively and become less defensive when confronted with conflicting evidence.
Embracing Humility
- Exercise flips a cognitive switch that allows us to imagine ourselves stepping into other people's shoes.
- Intellectual humility is a skill that makes us better decision-makers.
- People who practice intellectual humility are more objective and less defensive when evaluating evidence.
- We should be asking each other what we have changed our minds about and what uncertainties we are humble about.
Mister Rogers and Senator Pastore
- In 1969, Mister Rogers made a case for an increase in federal funding for public broadcasting before the United States congressional subcommittee on communications.
- Senator Pastore initially opposed Mister Rogers' proposal but eventually listened, engaged, and opened his mind to it.
- We need more people like Mister Rogers who possess technical skills in debate and persuasion as well as more people like Senator Pastore who listen, engage, and open their minds.
Transforming Conversations
- Pre-committing to the possibility of being wrong can help us think about what it would take to change our minds.
- The principles of debate can transform the way we talk to one another by empowering us to stop talking and start listening, persuading, opening our minds.