How To Stop Numbing | The Mindset Mentor Podcast
Stopping the Numbing
In this episode, Rob Dial talks about how people numb themselves and why they do it. He explains the two states of the nervous system and how numbing relates to them.
The Two States of the Nervous System
- There are two states in your nervous system - heightened and relaxed.
- Heightened is alertness, energy, fight or flight response, increased heart rate, breathing rate, and pupil dilation.
- Relaxed is conservation and restoration where heart rate and breathing decrease.
Why People Numb Themselves
- People numb themselves to calm their nervous system from a heightened state to a relaxed state.
- Many people lack tools to mentally and physically bring themselves down from a heightened state.
- People turn to drugs, alcohol, food as coping mechanisms.
Food Addiction
- Digestion is an energy-consuming process that turns off other body functions leading to relaxation after eating heavy food.
- Food addiction is common but often overlooked because food is necessary for life. Emotional connection with food can lead to overeating without considering if it nourishes the body or used as emotional numbing technique.
Personal Example
- Rob shares an example of his friend who has always struggled with weight despite working hard throughout the day but eats unhealthy foods at night.
Eating for Comfort and Self-Soothing
In this section, the speaker discusses how people eat to self-soothe and numb their emotions. They also mention other ways people use to cope with emotional problems.
Numbing Emotions
- Working was the speaker's way of numbing their emotions.
- Being a workaholic is rewarded and looked up upon like being a drug addict.
- People are constantly in a heightened state of emotion, so they look for something outside of them to calm down.
- Food, drugs, alcohol, sex, and working out are some things people use to bring themselves down.
Using Food as Comfort
- Many people use food as a way to calm down.
- Digestion is the most energy-consuming thing your body does; it sends your body into parasympathetic mode (relaxed).
- Food makes you feel relaxed and comfortable.
- Overeating can be used as a way to shut off heightened states.
Wine as Self-Soothing
- Some people drink wine at the end of the day to take the edge off.
- Alcohol stays in your system for up to 80 hours.
- The media took studies about Resveratrol in red wine and ran with it; wine is not good for you.
The Importance of Self-Regulation
In this section, the speaker discusses why people tend to turn towards external sources such as food, alcohol, and drugs instead of developing tools for self-regulation.
Why Do We Turn Towards External Sources?
- People often turn towards food, alcohol, drugs, or other activities to regulate their mental state instead of developing tools for self-regulation.
- Breathing is a powerful tool that can help regulate our internal status. Six deep breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth can quickly change our mental state from heightened to calm.
- Other tools for self-regulation include meditation and journaling.
Running From Our Subconscious
- People tend to shame others for using drugs or alcohol but may not recognize their own tendencies to numb themselves with other activities such as overeating or working too much.
- It's important to reflect on what we are running from and develop healthy ways to cope with stress and anxiety.
The Challenge of Boredom
- Many people struggle with being bored because they feel like they need to be doing something all the time.
- However, there is nothing inherently wrong with being bored; it is simply the absence of something to do.
Understanding Boredom
In this section, the speaker discusses how boredom can reveal what is already inside of us and why we tend to run away from it.
What Comes Up When You're Bored?
- Boredom allows what is already inside of us to come to the surface.
- What comes up when we are bored is usually what we are running from or numbing ourselves from.
- Instead of running away from boredom, we should use it as an opportunity to work through what is bubbling under the surface.
- We are addicted to stimuli and lack the tools to stay calm and regulate our nervous system.
Learning to Work Through It
- Numbing ourselves prevents us from understanding what we are addicted to and what we are trying to run away from.
- Breathing, meditating, and journaling can help us work through our emotions and release them.
- All our emotions live inside our body; we need to allow them to come up so that we can let them go.
- Working through our emotions helps us stop being addicted to numbing or running away.
Conclusion
The speaker encourages listeners not to be afraid of boredom but instead use it as an opportunity for self-reflection. By working through our emotions, we can learn how to calm our nervous system and stop being addicted to numbing or running away.