we need to talk

Introduction

In this section, the speaker introduces herself and her dog Twinkie. She also mentions that she has received many requests to live stream.

• The speaker introduces herself and her dog Twinkie.

• She mentions that she has received many requests to live stream.

Q&A Session

In this section, the speaker answers questions from viewers on various topics such as leukemia, My Sister's Keeper movie adaptation, blocking reactors on Instagram, therapy sessions, and favorite meals.

• The speaker clarifies that she does not have leukemia.

• She explains that she did read the book My Sister's Keeper but did not say it was an accurate representation of the book in the movie adaptation.

• The speaker shares that she has been blocking reactors on Instagram who use her social media to twist her words or monetize what she says.

• She talks about how therapy is going well for her and mentions having two more appointments left.

• The speaker shares about a couscous meal she made recently which was one of her favorites from the past week.

Conclusion

In this section, the speaker talks about trying to balance creating content that both she enjoys and what her supporters want while addressing some negative feedback.

• The speaker expresses feeling overwhelmed with trying to create content that pleases everyone while still doing what makes her happy.

Destiny's Mom Incident

In this section, the speaker talks about an incident with Destiny's mom and how it affected her.

Personal Information Sharing

• The speaker expresses discomfort with Destiny sharing personal information about her.

• She clarifies that she had permission to share personal information about Destiny.

Story of the Incident

• The speaker explains that she was not disrespecting Destiny's mom and offers to tell the full story.

• She acknowledges that people may choose to believe a more entertaining version of events.

• She emphasizes the importance of sharing her side of the story.

Background on Relationship with Mendy

• The speaker shares that she became close with Mendy after breaking up with Destiny.

• She reveals that Mendy wanted her to move in and loved her like a daughter.

• She recounts finding out after Mendy passed away that she considered her a daughter.

Details of the Incident

• The speaker describes how Destiny's mom would act when drinking alcohol.

• She shares how Mendy would take out her anger on her, which others around them noticed.

• The speaker recalls an incident where Mendy got violent with her while discussing work options.

Leaving Mindy's House

In this section, the speaker discusses leaving Mindy's house due to ongoing issues.

Options for Living Situation

• The speaker and Destiny were looking for a place to live because of ongoing issues at Mindy's house.

• She did not want to stay living there because Mindy would be drunk every night and take out anger on her.

Argument Over YouTube Career

• The argument started when the speaker expressed interest in pursuing a career on YouTube in addition to working at Source HOV.

• Mindy disagreed and didn't think she should do it or stay at home.

Mindy's Reaction

• Mindy got angry and started throwing the speaker's perfume down the stairs.

• The speaker felt traumatized by the incident and compared it to how her dad used to act.

Final Thoughts

• The speaker reflects on how things could have been different if previous incidents hadn't occurred.

• She acknowledges that she exploded emotionally during the argument but feels justified in standing up for herself.

Physical Abuse and Moving Out

In this section, the speaker talks about being physically abused by her girlfriend's mother and how it led to her decision to move out.

Physical Abuse

• The speaker was physically abused by her girlfriend's mother.

• She did not touch or disrespect her girlfriend's mother in any way.

• The abuse was both emotional and mental, which made the speaker terrified to come home.

• The physical abuse was the breaking point for the speaker, who decided that she needed to move out with her girlfriend.

Moving Out

• The speaker moved out quickly after the physical abuse incident.

• They were lucky to find a good place to live in despite having no money at that time.

• The situation living with her girlfriend's mother was mentally and physically hard for the speaker, which is why she used YouTube money to move out quickly.

Personal Information on YouTube

In this section, the speaker talks about sharing personal information on YouTube and addresses some of the criticisms she has received.

Sharing Personal Information

• The speaker only shared personal information about others if they gave permission or if they talked about it themselves on camera.

• She admits that she did not shower while living with her girlfriend's mother because she could not fit in the shower due to its size.

• Her ex-girlfriend laughed at this fact during a video, which upset the speaker as it felt like a personal attack.

Criticisms Received

• The speaker addresses criticisms about monetizing her relationships and clarifies that any money she made while in a relationship was shared with her partner.

• She also addresses criticisms about sharing personal information on YouTube and denies using it to monetize situations or people's struggles.

Destiny and Money

Amberlynn talks about her relationship with Destiny, admitting that she gave her money many times. She also mentions that Destiny would get mad at her when she refused to give her money.

Amberlynn's Relationship with Destiny

• Amberlynn admits that Destiny asked for money from her many times.

• Whenever Amberlynn refused to give Destiny money, she would get mad and they wouldn't hang out for weeks or months.

• Amberlynn paid for everything whenever they hung out together, including gas, food, movies, etc.

• There was a fine line between holding money over someone's head and being disrespected by them.

Dana vs. Destiny

Amberlynn compares her relationships with Dana and Destiny. She explains how Dana never made her feel disrespected like Destiny did.

Comparison of Relationships

• Whenever Amberlynn paid for something while hanging out with Destiny, she felt disrespected because of the way she treated her.

• You accept the love you think you deserve in friendships and relationships.

• In Vlogs, Amberlynn showed a happy side of herself even though deep down it was fake because of how much pain she was in due to the way Destiny treated her.

• Dana never made Amberlynn feel disrespected like how Destiny did. She was kind to her and called out any rude behavior from others towards Amberlynn.

Personal Information

Amberlynn talks about how Destiny is sharing personal information that is nobody's business. She also mentions that she has personal things to say about Destiny but won't share them.

Personal Information

• Destiny is sharing personal information that is nobody's business.

• Amberlynn has personal things to say about Destiny, but she won't share them because she doesn't want to be that kind of person.

• Amberlynn had a breakdown because she felt like no one would believe her side of the story. She feels like people have made her out to be a villain and it's easy for people to hate her.

• No matter what Amberlynn does, people think she's manipulating her audience.

Sharing Her Side of the Story

In this section, the speaker talks about how she wants to share her side of the story and be herself. She also discusses how difficult it is for her to shower due to her size.

Being Herself

• The speaker emphasizes that all she can do is be herself and share her side of the story.

Difficulty Showering

• The speaker explains that for a few months, she was not able to get in the shower due to her size.

• She expresses how hard it is for her to admit this in front of over 2000 people.

• The speaker wants people to know that there are things beyond their control, such as physical limitations.

Dealing with Negative Comments

In this section, the speaker addresses negative comments and how they affect her mental health.

Ads Starting

• The speaker apologizes if ads start playing during the live stream and interrupts what she's saying.

Victim Mentality

• The speaker reads a comment calling her a victim and explains how some people will always see her that way no matter what she does or says.

• She expresses frustration at feeling like there's a disconnect between herself and most of her audience who make negative comments.

Struggling with YouTube Content

In this section, the speaker talks about struggling with creating content on YouTube due to negative comments.

Feeling Overwhelmed

• The speaker admits that reading comments gives her anxiety attacks and makes it hard for her to create content on YouTube.

• She describes feeling like there's a big disconnect between herself and her audience.

Dealing with Haters

• The speaker discusses how difficult it is to stop filming for the haters and trolls, even though she knows it would be better for her mental health.

Reflecting on Past Actions

In this section, the speaker reflects on past actions and decisions.

Cake Gate

• The speaker acknowledges that many people disagreed with how she handled "Cake Gate" and wishes she had done things differently.

• Despite this, she stands by her decision to not eat the cake due to her dietary restrictions.

Handling Food Gifts and Disclaimers

In this section, the speaker talks about how she handled receiving food gifts from her viewers and why she decided to put a disclaimer on her videos. She also discusses how people's hearts are reflected in their actions.

Receiving Food Gifts

• After putting a disclaimer on her videos, the speaker received even more food gifts from viewers.

• The speaker gives away all of the food she receives and has help from Feline to sort through it.

• Despite the challenges of receiving food gifts, the speaker still enjoys connecting with her viewers through letters and other non-food items.

Addressing Negative Opinions About Others

In this section, the speaker addresses negative opinions about others and explains that it is possible to have a negative opinion while still being a changed person.

Snowflake Reactor

• The speaker expresses strong dislike for Snowflake Reactor due to his thumbnails and bringing up past events.

• The speaker clarifies that having a negative opinion about someone does not mean they have not changed as a person.

Personal Trauma

In this section, the speaker answers questions related to personal trauma and abuse.

Childhood Molestation

• The speaker confirms that she was molested by her cousin when she was seven years old.

• The speaker clarifies that she was sexually harassed by some of her father's friends during her teenage years but was never physically touched by them.

Foster Care Experience

• The speaker confirms that she was in foster care from the ages of 8 to 18 and briefly lived with her parents for a year and a half during that time.

Answering Viewer Questions

In this section, the speaker answers various questions from viewers.

Lego Building Stream and Apologies

• The speaker thinks a Lego building stream would be fun.

• The speaker's parents apologized for something.

Personal Life and Preferences

• The speaker has received paintings in their P.O box but is not sure if they received a specific one. They have opened all paintings on camera.

• The speaker is still taking a psychology course.

• The speaker has three younger brothers, two of whom were put up for closed adoption. One found them a few years ago, while the other's whereabouts are unknown.

• The speaker likes Led Zeppelin and Twinkie (their pet).

• When asked about their favorite Lego, the speaker finds it too hard to answer.

Miscellaneous Questions

• The speaker never said that their dad was dead.

• Feline (a cat) will probably never be shown on camera.

• The speaker is currently in a reading slump and not reading anything at the moment. They have been journaling though.

• No, the speaker would not create an OnlyFans account with certain content requested by viewers (scat eating).

• The Speaker has never fired a gun before.([])(T = 47m29sec)

Mental Health and Personal Growth

• The speaker is from Key West, Florida but grew up in Sonoma County, California.

• When asked how they are doing, the speaker says that they are good when they take away the bullying and harassment from YouTube. They have improved mentally and feel calmer and more content. However, certain things still bother them as they are human with feelings.

• The speaker responds to comments made by Destiny (a former partner) because sharing their side is important to them. They also mention that therapy and medication (Zoloft) have helped them improve their mental health.

Personal Preferences

• The speaker does not wear hats.

Zoloft and Cancer Symptoms

In this section, the speaker talks about her experience with Zoloft and how it has helped her manage bipolar II. She also discusses her favorite season. Later on, she talks about how she does not want to talk badly about her ex and that she would never laugh at their past problems. The speaker then goes on to discuss a sensitive topic related to cancer symptoms and how her ex laughed at it during a live stream.

Zoloft for Bipolar II

• The speaker mentions that Zoloft has been helping her manage bipolar II.

• She clarifies that medicine is different for everyone.

• The speaker's favorite seasons are spring or fall.

Not Here to Talk Bad About Ex

• The speaker states that she is not here to spill tea on her ex.

• She emphasizes that her heart always comes from a good place.

• The speaker saw clips of Destiny's live stream where she laughed at the way the speaker used to smell.

Sensitive Topic Related to Cancer Symptoms

• While the speaker had cancer, she bled for two and a half years.

• After having a hysterectomy in 2020, the bleeding stopped.

• One of the symptoms of cancer was related to bleeding which was very embarrassing for the speaker.

• The speaker cries while talking about all of the hate and bullying directed towards her.

Memory, Trauma and Narcissism

In this section, the speaker talks about her memory issues, how trauma affects memory, and addresses accusations of lying about her cancer diagnosis. She also discusses being called a narcissist and how it affects her mental health.

Memory Issues and Trauma

• The speaker acknowledges that she has memory issues due to trauma and therapy.

• Trauma can affect memory.

• The speaker shares personal experiences of abuse, cancer diagnosis, and sexual assault that are difficult to talk about.

Narcissism Accusations

• The speaker denies being a narcissist but admits to having narcissistic tendencies.

• The speaker clarifies that the Mountain Dew can story did not happen.

• The speaker talks about wanting to stop uploading videos on YouTube in the future.

Weight Loss Surgery Update

In this section, the speaker provides an update on her weight loss surgery journey.

Weight Loss Surgery Update

• The speaker does not have an update at the moment as she is in a "weird LOL period" with therapy.

Binge Eating Disorder and Weight Gain

In this section, the speaker talks about her experience with binge eating disorder and weight gain.

Gaining Weight Back After Stopping Ozempic

• The speaker gained most of her weight back after stopping Ozempic.

Super Chats and Foster Care

• The speaker thanks viewers for their super chats, which will go towards her weight loss surgery.

• She mentions having lived in several homes during her time in foster care.

Food Addiction and Traveling

• The speaker discusses how her food addiction caused anxiety when she couldn't get the food she craved.

• She expresses a desire to travel once she loses a significant amount of weight.

Life Perspective and Responding with Kindness

In this section, the speaker reflects on life perspective and treating others with kindness.

Life Perspective

• The speaker reflects on how a friend's daughter passing away made her realize that life is too short to be miserable.

• She emphasizes the importance of treating people with kindness because you never know what they're going through.

Responding with Kindness

• The speaker acknowledges that sometimes mental illness or trauma can cause her to react negatively but emphasizes that she never comes from a bad place.

• She discusses how Trisha Paytas' behavior towards Ethan Klein made her view Trisha differently but also inspired her to reflect on why people behave certain ways due to their own set of problems.

• The speaker notes that who she is in real life is different from how a large portion of the community views her.

Thoughts on Foodie Beauty, Skincare Routine, and Friendship with Dana

In this section, the speaker talks about their thoughts on Foodie Beauty, their skincare routine, and confirms that they are friends with Dana.

Thoughts on Foodie Beauty

• The speaker mentions that they don't watch Foodie Beauty as much as they used to.

• They confirm seeing a thumbnail of her new kitten but do not have any other thoughts to share.

Skincare Routine

• The speaker confirms that they do not have a skincare routine.

Friendship with Dana

• The speaker confirms that they are friends with Dana.

Apologizing for Treating Becky Poorly and Disgraceful Treatment of Bread Sender

In this section, the speaker apologizes for treating Becky poorly and acknowledges their disgraceful treatment of the bread sender.

• The speaker apologizes for treating Becky poorly during a live stream.

• They acknowledge that they treated the bread sender disgracefully and apologize for it.

• They explain that their hurt, pain, confusion, embarrassment, and fear led them to lash out.

• The speaker has apologized multiple times for their actions towards both Becky and the bread sender.

Sexual Orientation and Lesbian Phobia

In this section, the speaker discusses their sexual orientation and addresses lesbian phobia.

• The speaker confirms being a lesbian.

• They mention receiving unwanted attention from men which is why they made their Snapchat private.

• The speaker clarifies that people don't send inappropriate messages on Instagram like they do on Snapchat.

• They express shock at experiencing lesbian phobia during Pride month.

Trauma Excusing Terrible Behavior

In this section, the speaker agrees that trauma can excuse terrible behavior.

• The speaker agrees that Destiny's trauma and mental health should excuse her from every terrible thing she did or said to the speaker.

• They mention forgiving Destiny's mom easily because they know her past and trauma can cause shocking behavior.

Blocking a User and Living Sober

In this section, the speaker talks about blocking a user and their sobriety.

• The speaker blocks a user during the live stream.

• They confirm being sober from alcohol for 13 months.

• The speaker mentions not having done Delta eight in over a month.

Apologizing and Gender Preferences

In this section, the speaker discusses the concept of apologizing for past actions and how people are allowed to remember those actions. They also talk about the importance of growth and moving on from one's past. The speaker then talks about their gender preferences and how they struggle to explain it without coming off as offensive or ignorant.

Apologizing for Past Actions

• Apologizing does not erase the crappy things you do.

• People may forgive you, but they are allowed to remember those actions and dislike you for it.

• Growth needs to happen, and people need to move on from their past.

Gender Preferences

• Trans men/non-binary people can have vaginas.

• The speaker struggles to explain their gender preferences without coming off as offensive or ignorant.

• They prefer people who say they're female with vaginas.

• The speaker acknowledges that not all trans women have bottom surgery.

• Explaining one's preference as a lesbian is hard in today's society because it comes down to personal preference.

Learning More

• The speaker wants to learn more about gender preferences and educate themselves further.

• They acknowledge that they still have a lot to learn despite being part of the LGBTQ+ community at 32 years old.

• It's not cringe to want to learn more about a subject.

Amberlynn Reid: Clarifying Misconceptions

In this section, Amberlynn Reid clarifies some misconceptions about herself and her past relationship with Destiny.

Clarification on Seat Belt Incident

• Amberlynn does not remember the seat belt incident that was mentioned in a previous video.

• She believes Destiny when she says that the seat belt was not broken.

• Amberlynn acknowledges that Destiny is usually truthful but denies the Code Red Mountain Dew situation ever happened.

Dealing with Negative Comments

• Amberlynn expresses frustration with negative comments and blocks people who are rude or fat-shamey.

• She finds it difficult to read all of the negative comments and hopes that people are not like this in real life.

Questioning Sexuality

• Amberlynn finds it offensive when people question her sexuality.

• She has been a lesbian since she was 18 years old but had a few months where she questioned if she was attracted to men.

Relationship with Destiny

No Violence in Relationship

• Amberlynn denies any physical violence in her relationship with Destiny.

Breaking Up Story

• Destiny lied about wanting Amberlynn to quit her job. They both wanted her to work on YouTube full-time.

• When Destiny worked long hours, Amberlynn wanted her to call or text during lunch breaks just to say "I love you."

• The emotional cheating between Destiny and another woman caused tension in their relationship.

Emotional Cheating and Gaslighting in a Relationship

In this section, the speaker talks about their experience with emotional cheating and gaslighting in a past relationship. They describe how they felt when they found out about the cheating, how they were emotionally affected by it, and how their partner reacted when confronted.

Emotional Cheating and Breakup

• The speaker's girlfriend was emotionally cheating on them with someone else and lied about being around that person.

• The speaker confronted their girlfriend about the emotional cheating, which led to an argument and her turning off her phone.

• The speaker was afraid that their girlfriend was physically cheating on them as well.

• When the speaker asked if their girlfriend was breaking up with them, she replied "I guess I am" and ended the relationship.

Gaslighting and Post-Breakup Behavior

• The speaker felt like they were being gaslit by their ex-partner before even knowing what that word meant.

• After standing up for themselves, the ex-partner broke up with the speaker.

• The day after breaking up, the ex-partner tried to hook up with someone else while still talking to the speaker about possibly getting back together.

• While talking to someone new (Dana), the ex-partner continued to send messages to another person (Jay).

• Currently, the ex-partner is unblocking Dana randomly and sending her messages trying to talk to her behind her fiance's back.

• The speaker apologizes for messaging Destiny's ex from California, but only did so to apologize and never came from a bad place.

• The speaker describes their ex-partner as a cheater who is still actively cheating, whether it be physically or emotionally.

Personal Growth and Reflection

• The speaker admits to being codependent in the past relationship and having grown since then.

• The speaker clarifies that they were not obsessed with their ex-partner, but rather in a committed relationship where they were in love.

The Truth About Destiny

In this section, the speaker talks about how he protected Destiny's feelings and reputation for years, but is now done with it. He also discusses how he would rather make himself look bad than have someone else get treated poorly.

Protecting Destiny

• The speaker admits to protecting Destiny's feelings and reputation for years.

• However, he is now done surrounding himself with people that he has to protect.

• He would rather make himself look bad than have someone else get treated poorly.

Lies and Cheating

• The speaker talks about how lying to protect someone is not okay.

• He made himself look bad instead of having Destiny look bad.

• Destiny never apologized for cheating on the speaker.

• There is evidence that Destiny wanted to marry the speaker, despite her denial.

Money and Therapy

• The speaker admits to giving money to Destiny after they broke up.

• He will continue therapy after weight loss surgery because it will be what he needs most.

Moving On

• The speaker is over Destiny but angry about her recent actions.

• He is grateful for those who can see through her lies.

Miscellaneous

• The trial with the speaker's parents happened when he was 13 to 15 years old.

Overall, in this transcript, the speaker talks about his past relationship with a person named Destiny. He reveals that he protected her feelings and reputation for years, but is now done with it. He also talks about how he would rather make himself look bad than have someone else get treated poorly. The speaker discusses Destiny's lies and cheating, as well as the money he gave her after they broke up. Finally, he talks about moving on from the relationship and other miscellaneous topics.

Discussing Money and Relationships

In this section, the speaker discusses her experiences with money in relationships and how it has affected her. She also addresses questions about paying people for appearing in her videos.

Friend Using Her for Money

• The speaker talks about feeling hurt by a friend who used her for money and is now using her name to get more money.

• She expresses that the situation is scary.

Advice on Polyamorous Relationships

• The speaker admits to never being in a polyamorous relationship but advises against it if one hates it.

Paying People for Appearing in Videos

• The speaker responds to a question about whether Destiny deserved money for appearing in her vlogs during their relationship.

• She explains that she gave Destiny money, bought her food, clothes, and helped with bills.

• The speaker emphasizes that giving money was not enough and that she felt like people only wanted to be around her if she could pay for things.

• She gives an example of how much she makes from a video and how much she spent on having Destiny appear in it.

Being More Than Just Money

• The speaker reflects on feeling like all she could give people was money and how setting boundaries affected her relationships.

• She expresses that the feeling was one of the most horriblest feelings she ever felt.

Miscellaneous Topics

This section covers various topics such as Twinkie sleeping through drama, blocking viewers, YouTube ads, live streaming, Adblock, working overtime, and being a YouTuber.

Twinkie Sleeping Through Drama

• The speaker comments on how her dog Twinkie is sleeping through the drama.

Blocking Viewers

• The speaker mentions blocking viewers and explains that she wants to be transparent about it.

YouTube Ads and Live Streaming

• The speaker talks about ads running during the live stream.

• She mentions Adblock and how YouTube will soon block it.

• The speaker responds to a request for more live streams but is unsure if this will happen again.

Being a YouTuber

• The speaker reflects on being a YouTuber and how adding an extra ad can be seen as greedy.

• She expresses that people should do more to pay their bills if they can.

Jobs, Stress, and ASMR

In this section, the speaker talks about different jobs and the stress they cause. She also mentions that her current job is the hardest one she has ever done but also the most rewarding. The speaker also briefly talks about being a millennial with boomer energy, dying her hair a different color, and doing ASMR.

Jobs and Stress

• Every job causes its own little amount of stress.

• The speaker's current job is the hardest one she has ever done but also the most rewarding.

Personal Preferences

• The speaker briefly talks about being a millennial with boomer energy.

• She would dye her hair a different color if given the chance.

ASMR

• The speaker has done a few ASMR moments before.

Whistling and Being Immature

In this section, the speaker talks about whistling and being immature. She also briefly mentions not having seen The Little Mermaid yet and being sober.

Whistling

• The speaker demonstrates how she used to whistle loudly in high school.

• She attributes her ability to whistle to having had a gap in her teeth.

Being Immature

• The speaker encourages people to be immature until they have to be mature.

• She announces that she will get off of here soon.

Moving On from Past Relationships

In this section, the speaker expresses her desire not to talk about her ex, Destiny, anymore. She also briefly talks about giving her pets a bath and being scared of water.

Moving On

• The speaker expresses her desire not to talk about her ex, Destiny, anymore.

• She finds it weird that Destiny is watching reaction channels of her ex and thinks she should move on.

Personal Preferences

• The speaker talks about giving her pets a bath.

• She mentions being scared of water now despite having been able to swim in the ocean before.

Apology and Reflection

In this section, the speaker apologizes for her behavior in previous videos and acknowledges that she can get overly passionate about certain topics. She also reflects on her personal growth and improvement, as well as the pain caused by negative comments.

Apology and Personal Growth

• The speaker apologizes for using cuss words and getting heated in previous videos.

• She clarifies that confronting stories does not mean she hasn't changed or isn't improving.

• The speaker shares that she feels better now after switching medication.

• She corrects a false claim made about her weight gain.

Pain and Emotional Response

• The speaker acknowledges that the hate can be louder than the support sometimes, but she is working on it.

• She expresses gratitude towards those who support her.

• The speaker admits to not giving enough of herself to the right people, both online and offline.

Miscellaneous

• Some viewers' videos are the speaker's favorite way to relax.

• The speaker mentions being an emotional person like her mother.

• Feline and Dana would get along if they met according to the speaker.

• The speaker is unsure what she will eat today.

• Twinkie hears people outside and wants to go out.