VI Taller Yo No Renuncio: ¿Qué podemos hacer para conciliar mejor? ¿Cómo conciliar sin culpa?

Welcome to the Sixth Workshop on Sedation

Introduction and Context

• The speaker expresses excitement about the workshop, emphasizing empowerment and visibility for mothers.

• Reflects on the challenges faced in September, highlighting a need for work-life balance post-pandemic.

• Discusses feelings of indignation regarding workplace leadership models that have not adapted since the pandemic.

Activism and Leadership

• The goal of the association is to promote activism for work-life balance through monthly workshops.

• Introduces a collaborator who is an entrepreneur, emphasizing their role in fostering discussions around conciliation.

• Encourages participants to take notes and engage actively with the association's initiatives.

Community Engagement

• Acknowledges contributions from members that make these workshops possible, including technical support.

• Highlights partnerships with various institutions that support their mission of promoting entrepreneurial mindsets.

Understanding Work-Life Balance Challenges

Reflection on Personal Experiences

• Emphasizes that everyone can be a leader in their own life, regardless of formal titles or roles.

• Stresses the importance of revisiting concepts related to personal growth and leadership regularly.

Data Insights on Conciliation

• Shares statistics indicating that 80% of women struggle with work-life balance, averaging only 54 minutes of free time daily.

• Analyzes how this limited time translates into just 6% of waking hours dedicated to self-care.

Importance of Self-Care

• Discusses misconceptions about available free time; emphasizes that true conciliation includes personal well-being alongside family responsibilities.

• Mentions tools like "the wheel of life" as resources for assessing personal priorities and achieving better balance.

Conciliation and Women's Health: Understanding the Challenges

The Importance of Conciliation

• The speaker emphasizes the significance of achieving a balance in life, particularly for women, who often feel guilty when prioritizing self-care or personal time.

• There is a pervasive feeling among women that they are not fully present in their personal or family lives, highlighting the complexity of achieving conciliation.

• Acknowledging that discussions around conciliation often focus solely on personal and professional aspects, it’s crucial to recognize multiple areas of importance in women's lives.

Areas of Influence

• To achieve equilibrium, one must identify all significant areas in life beyond just work and home responsibilities.

• A study from Vall d'Hebron hospital reveals alarming statistics about women's health; they experience heart attacks at double the rate of men due to high stress levels leading to late medical intervention.

Stress and Health Implications

• Women often endure high levels of stress which can delay their response to serious health issues like heart attacks, resulting in fewer lives saved.

• Awareness is essential; understanding these pressures can motivate women to prioritize their health before reaching critical points.

Realistic Self-Care Strategies

• The discussion shifts towards practical steps women can take within their influence to improve their well-being by being realistic about their roles and responsibilities.

• The speaker introduces a metaphorical "flower" representing various intertwined roles women play—motherhood, professional life, financial management, self-care, learning, motivation, social connections (friendship), familial duties (daughter/son), and sexuality.

Diverse Roles Women Navigate

• Each role contributes uniquely to a woman's identity; for instance:

• Motherhood involves caring for children and spending quality time with them.

• Professional roles demand energy and commitment outside family obligations.

• Financial management is crucial as it impacts overall stability.

• Emphasizing self-care is vital; neglecting health can lead to burnout.

• Continuous learning fosters growth while motivating oneself helps maintain mental wellness.

• Social interactions through friendships provide emotional support during challenging times.

This structured approach highlights the multifaceted challenges women face regarding conciliation while underscoring the need for awareness and proactive strategies for better health outcomes.

Understanding the Balance of Roles in Life

Defining Important Roles

• The discussion emphasizes the importance of defining personal roles to avoid feeling overwhelmed. It suggests that individuals should identify which roles are significant and discard those that do not contribute positively to their lives.

The Need for Personal Care

• Acknowledges the necessity of self-care and personal growth, highlighting that financial stability is also crucial for maintaining balance in life.

Achieving Equilibrium Among Roles

• Introduces the idea that achieving balance does not mean choosing one role over another but rather integrating all important aspects of life without striving for perfection.

Challenging Societal Norms

• Reflects on societal pressures suggesting that excelling in one area (e.g., career) often comes at the expense of another (e.g., family), advocating instead for a holistic approach to fulfilling various roles.

Reducing Self-Demanding Attitudes

• Discusses how high self-expectations can lead to stress and feelings of inadequacy, stressing the need to lower these demands to achieve a sense of fulfillment across different areas.

The Interconnection Between Roles

Reconciliation with Self

• Emphasizes the importance of reconciling with oneself by recognizing how different roles can complement each other rather than conflict, leading to a more coherent life experience.

Prioritizing Values as a Parent

• Shares personal insights on motherhood prompting reflections on priorities and desired examples set for children, leading to transformative changes in lifestyle choices.

Time Management Skills Gained from Parenthood

• Highlights how motherhood enhances time management skills due to increased responsibilities, ultimately benefiting professional productivity despite initial perceptions of energy depletion.

Societal Recognition and Value of Motherhood

Transformative Nature of Motherhood

• Discusses how motherhood contributes significantly to personal development, providing opportunities for growth through challenges faced during parenting.

Collective Understanding Needed

• Calls for broader societal recognition regarding the value added by motherhood, urging both men and institutions to understand its social and economic significance.

The Importance of Time Management

Recognizing Time's Value

• Stresses the critical need for individuals, especially mothers facing challenges, to prioritize time for themselves amidst daily pressures.

Daily Awareness of Life's Ephemerality

• Conveys a poignant reminder about life's fleeting nature, encouraging mindfulness about daily experiences while acknowledging common forgetfulness regarding this reality.

Understanding Time Management and Presence

The Value of Time

• Life is perceived as eternal, leading to a lack of appreciation for the limited nature of time. This realization often comes only when faced with loss or illness.

Planning and Prioritization

• Effective time management requires planning and prioritizing important tasks over urgent ones. Without this, individuals may feel overwhelmed and lose control over their schedules.

Challenges for Mothers

• Mothers face unique challenges in managing their time, particularly in learning to say "no" to avoid overcommitting themselves due to societal pressures to please others.

Accepting Imperfection

• Embracing imperfection is crucial; it’s essential to let go of unrealistic standards that dictate how life should unfold, such as children's attire or meal preparation.

Reflections on Slowness

• Discussion includes insights from Carl Honoré's book "In Praise of Slowness," emphasizing the importance of slowing down in a fast-paced world. The author reflects on how this concept has evolved since the book's publication 15 years ago.

The Impact of Technology on Attention

Distraction by Mobile Devices

• The prevalence of mobile devices creates distractions that hinder meaningful interactions and presence during family moments, such as reading stories together.

Strategies for Mindful Engagement

• To combat mobile addiction, one strategy is to keep phones out of sight during meals or quality time with family, fostering more focused interactions.

Setting Boundaries with Technology

• Establishing rules around technology use can enhance personal connections. For instance, not allowing phones at the dinner table encourages deeper conversations among family members.

Finding Balance Amidst Chaos

Conscious Living

• It’s vital to create intentional moments amidst busy schedules where one can be present without distractions from daily responsibilities or technology.

Overcoming Guilt

• Many mothers experience guilt about balancing responsibilities; adopting an attitude that values one's own time can help alleviate these feelings and promote self-care.

Taking Control: The Concept of "Malas Madres"

Embracing Responsibility and Egoism

• The speaker emphasizes the importance of taking control and responsibility to address personal challenges, linking this to the concept of "malas madres" (bad mothers).

• Discussion on positive versus negative guilt; positive guilt motivates change while negative guilt stems from external judgments.

• Acknowledgment that a degree of egoism is necessary for self-care, encouraging individuals to prioritize their own needs.

The Impact of External Expectations

• Introduction of the "syndrome de la mari pili," which describes the tendency to please others at the expense of one's own priorities.

• Reflection on how previous generations of mothers faced loneliness and depression after children left home, highlighting the need for self-prioritization.

Setting Boundaries and Authenticity

• A powerful quote about not renouncing oneself serves as a reminder that setting boundaries can lead to better self-understanding.

• An exercise is proposed to help participants recognize when they are influenced by external pressures rather than their own feelings.

Recognizing False Guilt

• Importance of identifying when external expectations create false guilt; understanding whose needs are being prioritized helps reclaim authenticity.

• Encouragement to take charge of one’s life by making conscious decisions, even if it means facing discomfort or saying no.

Cultural Pressures and Self-Awareness

• Discussion on cultural biases that pressure women into perfectionism, leading them to feel like impostors who neglect their own needs.

• Recognition that many women are beginning to acknowledge these issues, prompting discussions about vulnerability as a strength rather than weakness.

Challenging Traditional Roles

• A narrative about societal perceptions regarding women's leadership in family dynamics highlights ongoing cultural challenges.

• The phrase "if you want it, you can do it" is critiqued for oversimplifying complex societal barriers women face in pursuing leadership roles.

This structured summary captures key insights from the transcript while providing timestamps for easy reference.

Embracing Roles and Time Management

Key Insights on Balancing Roles

• The speaker emphasizes the importance of being realistic and acknowledging all roles in life, not just two. Balance is about understanding what is important in moderation.

• Time management is highlighted as a significant challenge; dedicating time to manage it effectively can lead to better outcomes. A workshop with Kenzo is recommended for further insights.

• The concept of "bad mother" is discussed, focusing on the liberating feeling that comes from living motherhood freely without self-judgment or judgment from others.

Dream Board Exercise Introduction

• An exercise involving a dream board is introduced, aimed at helping participants visualize their aspirations beyond material desires.

• The speaker critiques traditional views of dream boards that focus solely on possessions, advocating instead for personal growth and identity.

Defining Identity Before Aspirations

Importance of Being Before Having

• To achieve goals like travel or owning a home, one must first embody the qualities of the person who has those things. This foundational mindset shift is crucial for success.

Action-Oriented Dream Board Creation

• Participants are guided to create a dream board focused on who they want to be in various roles (mother, partner, professional), emphasizing actionable steps towards these identities.

Practical Steps Towards Personal Goals

Structuring the Dream Board

• A practical approach involves creating columns for 'being' and 'action,' where individuals commit to specific actions that align with their desired identities.

Family Role Reflection

• In discussing family roles, participants reflect on how they wish to be more present as mothers—not just physically but emotionally engaged as well.

Professional Development Goals

• The speaker shares personal goals related to productivity and delegation within professional settings. They emphasize the need for better time management and prioritization.

Conclusion

The session encourages participants to actively engage in defining their identities across different roles while committing to actionable steps that foster personal growth and balance in life.

Strategies for Focus and Self-Improvement

Importance of Focus

• Emphasizes the need to avoid multitasking, advocating for dedicated time blocks to focus on specific tasks, such as responding to emails or working on projects.

Sharing Experiences and Inspiration

• Highlights the value of sharing personal experiences among mothers, which can inspire others to adopt small changes in their parenting approach, like practicing patience.

Setting Realistic Goals

• Discusses the significance of setting achievable goals related to personal desires and financial aspirations, encouraging women to articulate what they want realistically.

Small Actions Towards Change

• Suggests that small, manageable actions can lead towards becoming the person one aspires to be. This includes being more conscious about finances and taking control over personal economic situations.

Financial Awareness

• Recommends using tools like spreadsheets for better financial management and mentions a book by Natalia de Santiago that offers accessible financial advice tailored for women.

Health and Self-Care Practices

The Role of Self-Care

• Discusses the importance of self-care routines and how having supportive friends can encourage healthier habits, such as exercising together or going for walks.

Incorporating Exercise into Daily Life

• Encourages finding ways to integrate physical activity into daily schedules, even if it means walking instead of taking public transport after work.

Mindfulness Practices

• Mentions a meditation session that was only 10 minutes long but effective in promoting mindfulness amidst a busy household environment.

Personal Development Through Reading

Commitment to Reading

• Expresses a desire to prioritize reading more regularly, aiming for at least 20 minutes each day while also incorporating reading during other activities like cycling.

Utilizing Podcasts for Learning

• Highlights how podcasts serve as an excellent resource for learning new concepts through discussions with authors whose books are featured in episodes.

Accountability in Learning

• Shares personal experiences where accountability (like preparing for interviews with authors on podcasts) motivates consistent reading habits and deeper engagement with literature.

Purposeful Visibility

Empowering Women’s Visibility

• Clearly states a commitment to helping women become more visible in their professional lives so they can pursue fulfilling careers that resonate with their passions.

Connecting with Purpose: A Personal Revolution

The Importance of Purpose

• Connecting with one's purpose can lead to a personal revolution, providing clarity and direction in life.

• Having a clear mission, especially in areas like reconciliation, drives both personal and professional motivation.

Engaging in Reading and Growth

• Participation in reading clubs is encouraged as a means of personal growth; the speaker uses podcasts to promote literature.

• Emphasizing positivity is crucial; the speaker aims to counteract the tendency to focus on negativity and fears.

Strengthening Relationships

• The speaker expresses a desire to be more attentive to friends, highlighting the importance of remembering birthdays and special occasions.

• In family roles, being grateful and attentive is emphasized as essential for nurturing relationships.

Nurturing Romantic Relationships

• The speaker discusses the need for affection within romantic partnerships, suggesting actions like expressing love verbally and physically.

• Reflecting on how the pandemic has affected physical interactions, there's an acknowledgment of the need for emotional connection despite challenges.

Daily Actions Towards Fulfillment

• Small daily actions can lead to greater awareness of personal growth towards becoming who one wants to be.

• Encouragement is given for listeners to share their own actions that contribute positively to their lives through social media engagement.

Community Engagement and Support

• The importance of community feedback is highlighted; listeners are invited to share ideas that could help improve work-life balance.

• Activism for better reconciliation practices is underscored as vital during challenging times, particularly when returning from breaks or adapting back into work routines.

Reflections on Awakening and Change

Embracing Small Changes

• The speaker expresses gratitude, emphasizing the joy derived from sparking awareness in others.

• They highlight the importance of awakening "sparks" within individuals, suggesting that even small changes can lead to significant consciousness shifts.

• The message is centered around the idea that personal growth involves gradual transformations rather than immediate, large-scale changes.

• A heartfelt farewell is extended to mothers, indicating a sense of community and shared experience among them.

• The closing sentiment reinforces the notion of collective support and connection in the journey of self-discovery and change.