Orgasm Queen: Do This For 20 Minutes Before Having Sex & Your Sex Will Feel Brand New!

Orgasm Queen: Do This For 20 Minutes Before Having Sex & Your Sex Will Feel Brand New!

Understanding Orgasms and Sexual Potential

The Diversity of Orgasms

  • There are over 20 types of orgasms, with varying intensities and techniques required to achieve them.
  • The "queen of orgasms" is highlighted as a particularly intense experience that requires specific methods, distinct from what is often portrayed in pornography.

Introduction to Dr. Susan Bratton

  • Dr. Susan Bratton is a renowned sex specialist and author of over 30 books, focusing on enhancing sexual experiences through education.
  • Her personal journey into sexual exploration began after years of marriage without experiencing orgasm from intercourse, prompting her to seek solutions.

Common Sexual Struggles

  • Many individuals face challenges in their sex lives; acquiring skills can significantly improve these experiences.
  • When addressing concerns about sexual dissatisfaction, it's essential to explore the individual's current experiences and desired outcomes.

Misconceptions About Sexuality

  • Women often worry about being asexual or feeling inadequate due to societal pressures regarding sexual performance.
  • Dr. Bratton emphasizes the importance of effective communication in the bedroom and understanding one's desires for better sexual fulfillment.

Addressing Common Questions About Sex

Typical Inquiries from Women

  • A common concern among women is a loss of libido accompanied by feelings of guilt or inadequacy regarding their sexual interests.

Men's Concerns About Sexual Performance

  • Men frequently inquire about issues related to erectile dysfunction, penis size, or feelings of shame surrounding their desires.

Quality vs. Quantity in Sexual Experiences

  • Individuals often seek solutions for improving their sex lives by focusing on quality rather than quantity; enhancing quality can lead to more fulfilling encounters.

Dr. Bratton's Journey into Sexual Education

Transitioning Careers at Midlife

  • Dr. Bratton began her journey into sexuality at age 42 after realizing the need for deeper intimacy in her long-term marriage.

Personal Background Influencing Career Choice

Understanding Sexual Trauma and Healing

The Impact of Sexual Trauma on Intimacy

  • The speaker shares personal experiences with sexual trauma, highlighting that many individuals, regardless of gender, have faced some form of sexual trauma which affects their intimate lives.
  • They emphasize the importance of recognizing one's inherent identity and power despite past traumas, noting that healing involves both talk therapy and physical release techniques.
  • The speaker reflects on how trauma can lead to dissociation during intimacy, where one is physically present but emotionally detached from the experience.

Understanding Dissociation in Sexual Relationships

  • Dissociation is described as a protective mechanism against emotional pain, leading to a lack of connection with partners during intimate moments.
  • The speaker recounts how their partner helped them reconnect emotionally during intimacy by encouraging them to be present.

Exploring New Approaches to Intimacy

  • To enhance their sex life, the couple attended various workshops focused on tantra and intimacy skills, discovering new ways to connect beyond traditional intercourse.
  • They criticize mainstream portrayals of sex in media for lacking examples of heart-connected love-making that prioritize mutual pleasure over patriarchal norms.

Transitioning to Online Learning Platforms

  • Recognizing barriers such as cost and fear associated with attending in-person workshops, they decided to create online programs for accessible learning about intimacy and communication skills.

Redefining Sex Beyond Intercourse

  • The speaker discusses how early sexual experiences were often limited to basic intercourse-focused actions but emphasizes that true sexual fulfillment encompasses a broader range of activities.

Best Moments in Sexual Relationships

Defining Best Moments

  • The speaker reflects on personal best moments in sexual experiences, emphasizing that these moments are what make sex enjoyable and desirable.

Challenges in Sexual Relationships

  • Discusses a period of low sexual activity with a partner named Tim, describing it as "mercy sex" to avoid his misery.
  • Shares feelings of guilt associated with infrequent sexual encounters, questioning her own sexuality and the dynamics of their relationship.

Reviving Sexual Desire

Programs for Improvement

  • Introduces a program called "Revive Her Drive," aimed at couples where sex was once good but has since declined.
  • Highlights the realization that understanding a partner's needs is crucial for rekindling desire, noting common misconceptions about fixing issues solely through external means.

Healing from Trauma

Therapeutic Approaches

  • Describes working with various therapists, including those specializing in sexual trauma and somatic therapy, to address personal issues.
  • Acknowledges her ability to adapt quickly due to comfort with discomfort and change, influenced by her background in Silicon Valley.

Overcoming Genetic Barriers

  • Mentions genetic factors affecting emotional responses to trauma, which can hinder recovery for some individuals.

Processing Past Injustices

Writing as Therapy

  • Discusses the therapeutic exercise of writing down all past traumas related to sexuality as a method of processing pain.
  • Emphasizes the importance of being heard during therapy sessions as a pivotal moment for healing.

Understanding Sexual Trauma

Identifying Issues

  • Explains how awareness of past injustices led her to seek therapy when she recognized deeper issues affecting her sex life.

Common Experiences

  • Shares that many people experience similar challenges regarding sexual education and family influences on their perceptions of sex.

Impact of Family Dynamics

Parental Influence on Sexuality

Understanding Sexuality and Relationships: Insights from Personal Experience

The Role of Personal Responsibility in Sexuality

  • Individuals often lack the knowledge or tools to navigate their sexuality, which is ultimately a personal responsibility. It's essential to learn about one's own sexual health and desires as part of personal growth.
  • Overcoming trauma related to sexuality involves addressing issues like abuse, repression, shame, and fear stemming from a lack of knowledge.

Fear and Pleasure in Sexual Relationships

  • Fear is identified as a significant barrier to experiencing pleasure. Education about bodies and sexual pleasure can help mitigate this fear.
  • Many people apply the "golden rule" in sex—treating partners how they wish to be treated—rather than understanding their partner's unique needs, which is referred to as the "platinum rule."

Navigating Infidelity and Relationship Dynamics

  • The speaker reflects on discovering her partner's affair, emphasizing that it stemmed from both partners' struggles within a sexless marriage rather than betrayal.
  • She recognizes that her partner sought connection and pleasure elsewhere due to unmet needs in their relationship, highlighting gender differences in coping with sexual dissatisfaction.

Learning Together for Better Intimacy

  • The speaker emphasizes that understanding each other's bodies was crucial for improving intimacy. Both partners needed education on sexual function for better connection.
  • Once they learned techniques together, the focus shifted from merely servicing one another to mutual enjoyment during intimacy.

Turning Points in Their Relationship Journey

  • A pivotal moment occurred when the speaker considered separation after learning about the affair but chose reconciliation for the sake of their child.
  • They began therapy and attended sex workshops together, leading to significant improvements in their sexual relationship.

Exploring Non-Monogamy After Healing

  • After enhancing their intimacy through therapy, they opened up their relationship while maintaining a strong bond. This transition brought its own set of challenges but was ultimately fulfilling.

Open Relationships and Radical Honesty

Overview of Open Relationships

  • The speaker has been in an open relationship with their husband for over two decades, emphasizing that they have been open longer than closed.
  • They mention being guided by older couples who have maintained their open relationships, highlighting the importance of learning from experienced individuals.

Non-Monogamy Perspectives

  • The speaker clarifies that they do not advocate for any specific type of relationship style, stating that non-monogamy is just one approach among many.
  • They express the value of having multiple partners to gain diverse experiences and knowledge about intimacy and connection.

Communication Challenges in Relationships

  • The speaker identifies initiating conversations about relationship dynamics as a significant challenge, suggesting it can lead to conflict if not approached carefully.
  • They recount how practicing radical honesty helped save their marriage, emphasizing the need for transparency in communication.

The Importance of Truth-Telling

  • The practice of telling painful truths was initiated to overcome years of sugar-coating feelings; this led to deeper understanding between partners.
  • Sharing difficult truths can be liberating rather than offensive when expressed with love and respect.

Navigating Difficult Conversations

  • The speaker suggests framing concerns about a partner's health or well-being in a supportive manner rather than criticizing them directly.
  • They emphasize the importance of knowing each other's boundaries and desires to foster genuine love and support within the relationship.

Exploring Polyamory

Mutual Decision-Making in Polyamory

  • The decision to explore polyamory was mutual between the speaker and their partner after attending workshops together.

Sensation Play Experience

  • A workshop experience involved sensation play where participants would give physical affection while also sharing positive affirmations about one another.

Building Emotional Connection Through Affirmation

  • Receiving collective praise during workshops helped participants internalize kindness, fostering self-love and acceptance.

Games That Enhance Intimacy

  • The couple plays a game called "Three Things I Love About You," which helps maintain emotional connection by regularly expressing appreciation without repetition.

Audience Questions on Intimacy

Addressing Disconnection in Relationships

Understanding Relationship Disconnection

The Desire for Connection

  • Eliza expresses a feeling of disconnection with her partner, wishing to rekindle their relationship and have deeper conversations beyond daily logistics.
  • She reminisces about the lack of meaningful discussions, especially during child-rearing years, highlighting how life stages affect intimacy and connection.

The Impact of Parenthood on Relationships

  • Parenthood leads to exhaustion and can negatively impact sexual relationships; partners often find themselves struggling to maintain intimacy amidst the chaos.
  • As individuals age, they become more aware of their needs for intimacy and connection, realizing the importance of nurturing their sex lives as they grow older.

Body Image Issues in Relationships

  • Eliza discusses her struggles with body image post-childbirth, feeling disconnected from her own body and losing self-love.
  • The speaker explains that estrogen influences women’s perceptions of themselves, leading to critical views on body image despite external validation from partners.

Gender Differences in Perception

  • Women often feel unattractive while men typically view their partners positively; this disparity is attributed to hormonal differences between genders.
  • Testosterone affects men's self-perception, making them less critical about their appearance compared to women who are more judgmental due to societal pressures.

Rebuilding Connection: Practical Steps

  • To address feelings of disconnection, physical touch is emphasized as a foundational step towards rebuilding intimacy.

How to Reconnect in a Relationship?

Importance of Communication and Physical Connection

  • The first step in reconnecting is having an open conversation, followed by physical closeness without the need for dialogue. This can help partners feel more connected.
  • Eliza feels pressure regarding intimacy, believing they should be having sex despite not feeling ready or turned on. This highlights the disconnect between expectations and reality.
  • Female arousal requires time to transition from mental stress to physical readiness, often taking 15-30 minutes after a long period without intimacy.
  • Men often mistakenly focus on achieving orgasm rather than creating a safe space for their partner to relax and reconnect emotionally.

The Dangers of "Should" Mentality

  • The term "should" creates harmful social comparisons that lead to guilt and dissatisfaction in relationships. It reflects external pressures rather than personal needs.
  • Banning comparison within relationships can alleviate guilt and foster healthier communication about needs without referencing others' experiences.

Small Steps Towards Intimacy

  • Eliza could benefit from starting small with her husband, acknowledging their current challenges while gradually working towards greater intimacy together.
  • Practical suggestions include planning intimate evenings with no pressure for intercourse, focusing instead on relaxation and emotional connection.

Removing Pressure for Better Connection

  • Reducing performance pressure allows partners to explore intimacy at their own pace, fostering safety and relaxation which are crucial for arousal.

Overcoming Awkwardness in Intimacy

  • Silence during intimate moments can create awkwardness; addressing issues openly helps break this cycle of discomfort.
  • Open communication about feelings removes blame and judgment, making it easier to address problems together.

Embracing Playfulness in Sexuality

  • Engaging in "erotic play dates" encourages couples to have fun together without the pressure of specific outcomes or techniques.
  • Shifting focus from traditional sexual expectations (like penetration) to playful exploration enhances relationship energy and satisfaction.

Exploring Sexual Variety and Communication

The Importance of Novelty in Sexual Relationships

  • Emphasizes that while familiarity can be comforting, it may lead to a dull sex life. Introducing variety and novelty is essential for maintaining excitement and engagement.
  • Highlights the significance of trust, safety, and communication as foundational elements that allow partners to express their needs openly without fear of judgment.

Creating a Sex Life Bucket List

  • Introduces the concept of a "sex life bucket list," which includes 48 creative ideas aimed at enhancing sexual experiences. This tool encourages couples to explore new activities together.
  • Discusses how couples can categorize their interests into 'A', 'B', and 'C' lists based on desire levels, promoting open dialogue about preferences.

Overcoming Resistance to New Experiences

  • Shares a personal anecdote about introducing sex toys into a relationship, illustrating the challenges faced when one partner is resistant or dismissive of new ideas.
  • Raises questions about how individuals should respond when their proposals for exploration are met with ridicule or rejection from their partners.

Educating Partners About New Concepts

  • Suggests ways to educate hesitant partners by framing new experiences positively, such as proposing joint visits to stores that sell adult toys.
  • Encourages discussions around fears associated with using toys, emphasizing understanding each other's perspectives rather than dismissing them outright.

Addressing Age Stereotypes in Sexuality

  • Reflects on societal stereotypes regarding age and sexuality, arguing against the notion that certain practices are only suitable for older individuals.
  • Advocates for exploring desires regardless of age-related assumptions, encouraging couples to focus on mutual interests found in their bucket lists.

Navigating Differing Sexual Desires

  • Considers scenarios where partners have opposing fantasies or desires. It raises awareness about differing "sex languages" within relationships.

Exploring Sexuality and Comfort Zones

The Importance of Exploring Different Aspects of Sexuality

  • The discussion begins with the idea that individuals should explore various aspects of their erotic blueprint, similar to love languages. It encourages trying different roles in sexual dynamics, such as being passive or dominant.
  • Emphasizes the importance of stepping out of comfort zones to enhance sexual experiences. Safety combined with novelty is highlighted as a formula for increasing desire.

Novelty in Long-Term Relationships

  • The speaker humorously notes that even after many years together, there are still endless new ideas to explore in intimacy. This highlights the potential for continuous growth and exploration within relationships.
  • Describes how partners can collaboratively brainstorm ideas for intimate encounters, fostering a sense of comfort and openness about desires.

Understanding Human Nature in Intimacy

  • Discusses the need to be attuned to one's own animalistic instincts during intimate moments. Recognizing emotional states and physical needs can lead to more fulfilling experiences.
  • Highlights that humans are part of the animal kingdom, which influences our desires and behaviors. Factors like mood, diet, and stress levels play significant roles in sexual appetite.

Addressing Common Concerns: Performance Anxiety

  • A listener shares concerns about premature ejaculation affecting his partner's pleasure during sex. This issue is identified as common among men across all ages.
  • Introduces Jim Benson's program "Multi Orgasmic Lover," which aims to help men achieve ejaculatory choice—ejaculating when they want rather than prematurely.

Techniques for Enhancing Sexual Experience

  • Explains a technique called "me breath," which combines physical exercises (like squeezing specific muscles), breathing techniques, and pelvic movements to help men control arousal better.
  • Compares learning this technique to mastering skills like driving or golfing; it requires practice and awareness of bodily sensations.

Understanding Female Anatomy for Better Experiences

  • Clarifies misconceptions about female anatomy by stating that the vagina is not merely an inside-out penis but a complex structure capable of providing diverse sensations.
  • Encourages men to adopt a more relaxed approach during intercourse instead of rigid motions, which can lead to premature ejaculation.

Practicing Mindfulness During Intimacy

Understanding Sexual Connection and Techniques

The Importance of Presence in Sexual Experiences

  • Emphasizes the pressure on partners during sexual encounters, highlighting that focusing solely on a partner's orgasm can detract from mutual enjoyment. Encourages being present and mindful.
  • Suggests practicing breathing techniques to enhance intimacy, noting that pelvic rocking can be pleasurable for both partners during intercourse.

Evolving Perspectives on Sexuality

  • Reflects on personal growth in understanding sex, moving away from a fast-paced approach influenced by pornography towards a more patient and enjoyable experience.
  • Discusses the joy derived from watching a partner's pleasure, indicating the importance of shared experiences in sexual relationships.

Exploring Yoni Massage and Its Significance

  • Introduces Yoni massage as an essential technique for male partners looking to enhance their partner's pleasure, emphasizing its cultural significance.
  • Clarifies terminology around female anatomy, explaining the difference between vagina and vulva while promoting respectful language like "Yoni."

Tools for Enhancing Pleasure

  • Advocates for using tools (referred to as toys), particularly lay-on toys designed to stimulate external areas effectively before penetration.
  • Describes specific lay-on toys such as the Pulse Queen, which utilizes vibrating technology to provide targeted stimulation.

Understanding Female Anatomy and Response

  • Explains how male anatomy differs from female anatomy regarding erectile tissue and arousal processes. Highlights that women require more time to achieve full arousal compared to men.

Understanding Female Sexual Response and Orgasm Techniques

The Misconception of Readiness for Sex

  • The portrayal of sexual encounters in movies often misrepresents women's readiness, suggesting that physical intimacy can occur without adequate emotional or physiological preparation.
  • Women may not feel aroused ("lady boner") if they haven't been sufficiently stimulated beforehand, leading to a disconnect during intercourse.

Types of Orgasms

  • There are over 20 types of orgasms, including various locations and techniques for stimulation. This includes vaginal, anal, breast gasms, and more.
  • Specific techniques exist for female ejaculation that differ from what is typically shown in pornography; understanding these can enhance sexual experiences.

Orgasm Dynamics

  • Traditional views on orgasm often depict it as a singular event; however, many women can experience multiple orgasms with the right approach.
  • Encouragement and gentler touch can lead to multiple orgasms rather than a quick finish; foreplay is essential for enhancing pleasure.

Extended and Expanded Orgasms

  • Extended orgasms involve prolonged sensations where the individual remains engaged in the experience rather than rushing through it.
  • Expanded orgasms represent an advanced state where individuals ride waves of pleasure over extended periods, allowing deeper connection and satisfaction.

Personal Experiences with Orgasm Techniques

  • The speaker shares personal anecdotes about achieving long-lasting orgasms through learned techniques, emphasizing the importance of exploration in sexual experiences.
  • A transformative moment occurred when the speaker connected deeply with their own sexuality during an intense orgasmic experience.

Addressing Relationship Challenges

  • Discusses concerns about maintaining intimacy in relationships as routines become mechanical; emphasizes communication and learning new techniques to revitalize connections.

21 Erotic Play Dates and Techniques

Introduction to the Program

  • The program consists of 21 erotic play dates, focusing on a five-stroke technique.
  • Recommendations include starting with a sex life bucket list, trying toys, and exploring Yoni massages.

Recommended Toys for Couples

  • A popular choice for partnered sex is a double vibrating penis ring that enhances pleasure for both partners.
  • Another suggestion is the "digit," which allows for easy clitoral stimulation during penetration without losing grip due to lubrication.

Pleasure Protocol Components

  • The pleasure protocol includes cocoa butter melts infused with CBD and botanicals designed to enhance vaginal sensations.
  • An arousal oil is recommended to be applied externally on various parts of the vulva to increase sensitivity and pleasure.

Enhancing Breast Pleasure

  • Discussion about using breast oil for nipple stimulation reveals its potential in enhancing sexual experiences through breast pleasure.
  • Personal anecdotes highlight the importance of connecting emotionally while engaging in physical intimacy, such as sharing daily experiences during intimate moments.

Learning About Oral Sex and Nipple Stimulation

  • There’s an expressed desire to learn more about oral sex techniques and how to effectively stimulate nipples without feeling awkward.

Understanding Oral Techniques and Energy Management

The Importance of Learning and Connection in Sexual Experiences

  • The speaker emphasizes the value of learning effective oral techniques, suggesting that many people who claim to dislike oral sex may not have experienced it positively.
  • Mutual oral pleasuring (69) is discussed; the speaker encourages a relaxed approach rather than focusing on concentration, highlighting the energy exchange during such intimate acts.

Managing Energy for Optimal Performance

  • The speaker shares personal experiences with mainstream energy products, noting issues like high sugar content and jitters, which led to dissatisfaction.
  • A recommendation for "perfected" energy products is made, claiming significant improvements in cognitive and physical performance for both the speaker and their team.

Utilizing Freelancers for Business Support

  • As year-end approaches, the pressure increases to complete projects; freelancers are considered essential for meeting ambitious goals.
  • Fiverr is introduced as a reliable platform for finding skilled freelancers across various fields, allowing users to review portfolios before hiring.

Libido Changes During Manipause: Factors at Play

Variability in Libido During Manipause

  • Discussion on how libido can fluctuate during manipause; some individuals report enhanced sexual experiences while others experience a decline.
  • Low testosterone levels are linked to low libido but are not the sole factor; genetics, diet, and emotional health also play crucial roles.

Understanding Libido, Desire, and Arousal

  • Definitions of libido (health), desire (self-perception), and arousal (physical readiness); these terms are often confused but represent distinct concepts.
  • The importance of self-love and acceptance is highlighted as essential for maintaining a fulfilling sex life despite aging or body changes.

Addressing Routine in Sexual Relationships

Frustrations with Sexual Routine

  • A listener's frustration about repetitive sexual routines is acknowledged; this reflects deeper issues related to comfort zones in intimacy.

Exploring Orgasmic Pathways and Sensation

Understanding Orgasmic Cross Training

  • The speaker emphasizes the importance of exploring various types of orgasms, suggesting "orgasmic cross training" to enhance sexual experiences.
  • They recommend starting with familiar techniques and gradually introducing new elements, such as breast play, to stimulate different areas of the body.

Sensation and Neural Pathways

  • Different women may experience a range of feelings when touched; these can include pain, numbness, shame, or pleasure. The key is to activate orgasmic sensations through loving touch.
  • By engaging all sensory pathways and nerve endings, individuals can facilitate easier orgasms. Yoni massages are suggested as a way to activate tissue without relying solely on established pathways.

Connection Between Sensation and Pleasure

  • Women often struggle with staying connected to their bodies during sexual experiences. A sex therapist's role includes teaching clients how to remain in sensation.
  • The discussion shifts towards the impact of masturbation and pornography on relationships, highlighting a lack of conversation around women's addiction to pornography.

Perspectives on Pornography

  • The speaker shares their personal views on pornography, noting that while they don't oppose it outright, they prefer fostering deeper connections over mere physical friction.
  • They argue for living one's own sexual agenda rather than conforming to what is depicted in pornographic content.

Addiction and Its Effects

  • While the speaker has not encountered women addicted to pornography, they acknowledge many men face significant challenges with addiction that require withdrawal efforts.
  • Citing a study indicating 96% of sampled porn clips were degrading towards women, the speaker expresses concern about societal perceptions shaped by such content.

Embracing Masturbation and New Technologies

  • Masturbation is framed positively as a means for activating pleasure centers within the body. Fantasy is encouraged as part of this practice.
  • Innovative sex toys are introduced that enhance pleasure through warmth or unique sensations like inflation inside the vagina.

Recommendations for Sexual Exploration

Understanding Sexual Health and Communication

Importance of STI Testing

  • The speaker emphasizes the necessity of STI testing before engaging in sexual activities beyond kissing or light touching, highlighting their role as a chief advocacy officer for polyamorous groups.
  • They stress that many STIs can have long-term effects, making it crucial to know one's status through testing rather than assuming safety.

Learning and Exploration in Sexuality

  • The discussion revolves around the idea that sexuality is a lifelong journey filled with pleasure and learning; ignorance breeds fear, while knowledge fosters confidence.
  • It is noted that all bodies are capable of experiencing multiple types of orgasms, challenging the misconception that men have only one type.

Seeking Therapy for Relationship Issues

  • The speaker advocates for seeking therapy when facing mismatches in desire or libido within relationships, suggesting it as a first step before considering separation.
  • They acknowledge the difficulty some partners may have in initiating therapy discussions due to embarrassment or fear of judgment.

Benefits of Couples Therapy

  • Sharing personal experiences, the speaker describes how couples therapy provides a safe space for honest communication about relationship dynamics and unmet needs.
  • Regular therapy sessions can enhance overall relationship satisfaction by establishing dedicated times for important conversations.

Gender Dynamics in Communication

  • The speaker reflects on gender differences in communication styles, noting that women often articulate needs more effectively than men, who may feel intimidated during discussions.
  • They highlight the stereotype "happy wife, happy life," suggesting it stems from men's simpler expressions of needs compared to women's complex awareness of emotional requirements.

Recognizing Unmet Needs

  • The importance of recognizing unmet needs is emphasized; what might be an unrecognized issue for one partner could be significant for another.

Insights on Intimacy and Relationships

Importance of Connection in Intimate Relationships

  • Emphasizes the significance of small offers, yoni massages, and holding each other to enhance intimacy. The act of holding is described as mutually beneficial.
  • Stresses the importance of maintaining physical health through exercise and sleep to ensure a fulfilling sexual life throughout one's lifetime.

Reflecting on Personal Growth

  • Introduces a reflective question about what advice one would give their 20-year-old self for greater happiness and success.
  • Suggests that individuals should embrace their gifts and talents without compromising them for others' comfort, advocating for living an extraordinary life.

Learning from Experiences

  • Discusses insights gained about the limbic system's role in relationships and the importance of removing pressure around sex to foster connection.
  • Proposes scheduling "play dates" without expectations of penetrative intercourse to build foundational connections.

Managing Desire in Long-Term Relationships

  • Introduces the concept of "desire management," likening it to maintaining a flame that requires just the right amount of oxygen—balancing safety with novelty.
  • Highlights how routine can stifle desire, suggesting that occasional distance or new experiences can reignite passion.

Observations on Relationship Dynamics

  • Shares anecdotes about friends' relationship dynamics, particularly regarding moving in too quickly and its potential pitfalls.
  • Reflects on different approaches to relationships, including long-distance dynamics, emphasizing that there is no one-size-fits-all solution.

Breaking Taboos Around Sexuality

  • Acknowledges the stigma surrounding discussions about sexuality and relationships, aiming to bring these topics into open conversation.

The Importance of Small Improvements

Measuring Performance in Podcasting

  • The team emphasizes their obsession with minute details, such as monitoring CO2 levels in the studio during recordings to optimize cognitive performance.
  • A threshold of 1,000 parts per million is identified as critical; exceeding this level can lead to a decline in cognitive function.

The Power of Compounding 1%

  • The concept of compounding small improvements (1%) is highlighted as a transformative approach to achieving significant life changes.
  • Emphasis is placed on consistent, incremental actions rather than seeking drastic transformations or quick wins.

Development of a Motivational Diary

  • Two years ago, the team initiated the creation of an aesthetically pleasing diary designed to inspire and motivate users.
Video description

Susan Bratton is a renowned relationship and intimacy expert. She is the CEO of ‘The 20’ and ‘Personal Life Media’ and the bestselling author of 34 books including, ‘Relationship Magic’, ‘Revive Her Drive’, and ‘Sexual Soulmates: The Six Essentials for Connected Sex’. 00:00 Intro 02:04 What Do You Do and Why Do You Do It? 02:36 Advice for Someone Struggling With Their Sex Life 04:57 Common Questions Women Ask About Sex 05:35 Common Questions Men Ask About Sex 06:27 Quality vs. Quantity in Relationships 06:41 Susan’s Journey to Becoming a Sexpert 08:35 Lessons From Overcoming Sexual Trauma 09:52 What Is Dissociation in Sexual Contexts? 12:38 Susan’s Personal Struggles With Her Sex Life 15:49 Are You Offering Mercy Sex? 17:34 Steps to Healing Sexual Trauma 20:34 Identifying Problems in Your Relationship 21:41 Exploring Sex Injustice and Trauma 24:15 Affair in Susan’s Marriage: A Discussion 28:46 Understanding Non-Monogamy 31:20 How to Start Conversations About Sex With Your Partner 34:02 Becoming Polyamorous: Susan’s Story 36:20 First Question From the Audience 42:07 Overcoming Body Image Issues in Relationships 43:01 Reconnecting With Your Partner: Two Proven Techniques 46:47 How Comparisons Hurt Intimacy in Relationships 48:53 Why There Shouldn’t Be Pressure Around Sex 50:30 Exploring Erotic Playdates 54:25 What to Do When Your Partner Mocks Your Sexual Fantasies 57:04 Managing Communication Between Opposite Sexes in Relationships 59:23 How Safety and Novelty Create Desire 01:01:53 Overcoming Early Ejaculation 01:07:26 What’s the Most Effective Sex Toy? 01:09:36: The Pulse Queen: A Review 01:10:11 The Vibe: Benefits and Features 01:13:45 Understanding Different Types of Orgasms 01:19:23 Third Question From the Audience 01:20:13 How to Have an Expanded Orgasm With Your Partner 01:20:33 Women’s Favourite Sex Toy: A Guide 01:22:17 The Pleasure Protocol Explained 01:25:55 Fourth Question From the Audience 01:27:35 Sponsored Ads 01:29:27 Menopause vs. Libido: Addressing Changes 01:29:59 Libido, Desire, and Arousal: The Connection 01:30:46 How Testosterone Levels Affect Libido 01:31:56 When Sex Becomes Routine: Tips for Reigniting Passion 01:36:24 Pornography and Masturbation: The Impact on Relationships 01:40:52 The Importance of STI Testing 01:43:22 Knowing When to Walk Away From a Partner 01:48:12 Last Guest's Question 01:48:57 Question for Steven Follow Susan: Instagram - https://g2ul0.app.link/Ivv8wcFA3Ob Twitter - https://g2ul0.app.link/EPecOdHA3Ob Website - https://susanbratton.com/ 🚀 The 1% Diary is live - and it won’t be around for long, so act fast! https://bit.ly/1-Diary-YT-ad-reads You can purchase Susan’s book, ‘Hot To Trot’, here: https://g2ul0.app.link/N9bCRMMA3Ob Get access to exclusive Diary of a CEO content: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGq-a57w-aPwyi3pW7XLiHw/join You can purchase Susan’s book, ‘Hot To Trot’, here: https://g2ul0.app.link/N9bCRMMA3Ob You can purchase the The Diary Of A CEO Conversation Cards: Second Edition, here: https://g2ul0.app.link/f31dsUttKKb Sponsors: PerfectTed - https://www.perfectted.com with code DIARY40 for 40% off Fiverr - https://fiverr.com/diary and use code DIARY for 10% off your first order