15 Helena - Machado de Assis

Chapter 15: Estácio's Morning

Estácio's Early Departure

• Estácio wakes up early, intending to surprise his aunt and sister with a note stating he will return by 6 AM.

• He encounters Helena at the foot of the stairs; she expresses concern about him waking up so early, highlighting their close relationship.

• Helena urges Estácio not to forget her while he is away, indicating her emotional attachment and desire for communication.

The Farewell

• Their farewell is filled with unspoken emotions; Helena struggles to let go as they exchange goodbyes.

• After Estácio leaves, Helena feels a mix of sadness and contemplation in her room before quickly dressing for a ride.

Journey to the Alpendre

• Helena mounts her horse and sets off towards the Alpendre, accompanied by Vicente on one of the mules.

• Upon arrival at the house, she finds it silent and closed, reflecting her growing impatience and longing.

Attempting Communication

• Frustrated by no response from inside the house, Helena writes a note and slips it under the door in hopes of contact.

• As she returns home slowly on horseback, her thoughts are heavy with melancholy despite having company.

Mendonça's Feelings

Emotional Turmoil

• Mendonça experiences conflicting feelings about his future; he senses that half of his life has ended while another begins.

• His affection for Helena grows silently; he admires her without revealing his feelings or intentions.

Social Dynamics

• The social circle discusses potential marriage between Mendonça and Helena; opinions suggest it is likely but complicated by familial concerns.

Estácio's Letters

Arrival of News

• The first letters from Estácio arrive during an evening gathering among family members after dinner.

Expressions of Longing

• In his letter, Estácio expresses deep homesickness and nostalgia for his family and daily life back home.

Reflections on Life and Relationships

Contemplation of Personal Aspirations

• The speaker expresses a sense of obligation towards a candidacy that does not appeal to them, indicating a desire to protect their reputation despite personal disinterest.

• A recollection of past conversations leads to reflections on companionship, highlighting the contrast between current company and memories associated with family members.

Discontent with Current Circumstances

• The speaker acknowledges feelings of distraction and dissatisfaction, revealing an internal struggle with modesty and self-perception amidst discussions about societal issues like taxes and slavery.

• There is an admission of discomfort with agricultural life, suggesting a preference for solitude over social chaos, which aligns with their introspective nature.

Emotional Vulnerability

• The speaker reveals deep emotional struggles, feeling inferior in comparison to others while grappling with the concept of love and connection.

• An invitation for open communication is extended; the speaker desires honesty about thoughts related to them, emphasizing the importance of shared experiences.

Reflections on Mortality

• A discussion about a friend’s health introduces themes of mortality; the speaker contemplates the futility of prolonging life when death seems inevitable.

• Frustration arises from the situation's helplessness as they await news regarding their friend's condition while reflecting on life's transient nature.

Requests for Connection

• The speaker requests books and personal items from a loved one as a means to maintain connection during difficult times, underscoring their longing for familial ties.