Reminder - Never Make Her Your Focus

The Danger of Making Your Woman Your Focus

In this section, the speaker discusses the danger of making your woman your focus and how it can lead to complacency and resentment.

The Jeffrey Example

• Jeffrey hit the gym and made himself attractive, got a girlfriend, but he may get complacent and lose his attractiveness over time.

• Men falsely believe that they can relax once they have their dream relationship, but this is when the real tests begin.

• Making your woman your focus can lead to resentment because you lose every little part of yourself that was attractive in the first place.

The Adonis Example

• Adonis kept his attention on his mission instead of making his woman his focus. This made Anastasia even more attracted to him.

• As you work hard and improve yourself, you will become more attractive to women over time. However, there will be a threshold where you can no longer hold out on getting into a relationship.

• Young men who are ambitious and putting in a huge amount of work to change themselves will outgrow every girlfriend they get for a long time.

The Potential Trap

• There is a potential trap for men who keep improving themselves: they become more attractive to women over time and eventually make their woman their focus above their goals.

• Small habits that seem unimportant, such as reading goals every morning or not using your phone for the first 30 minutes of the day, can make a difference when replaced with things done with your girl or girls you're texting.

Conclusion

• Many guys have similar goals as you do. Don't make the mistake of making your woman your focus and losing yourself in the process.

Don't Lose Focus on Your Goals

In this section, the speaker emphasizes the importance of not losing focus on your goals and prioritizing them over distractions such as relationships.

Prioritize Your Goals Over Distractions

• Most things we want are competitive and distractions will win if you lose focus.

• Wake up thinking about your goals, go to sleep thinking about your goals, and navigate your day with girls but never make them your focus.

• The best way to seem busy is to actually be busy on your goals.

• Losing focus on his goals has happened to the speaker in past relationships.

Small Changes Can Have a Big Impact

• The speaker was disciplined during his monk mode period but lost focus after going on a first date with a girl.

• He gradually started making small changes such as drinking alcohol, staying up late, and smoking weed with her that led to a decline in his progress towards his goals.

• By April 2021, he noticed that there were no screenshots of his YouTube success and his physique wasn't looking as good compared to before.

The Best Relationship Dynamic

In this section, the speaker talks about the best relationship dynamic and how it is not where a man pursues a woman but where he pursues his goals and she pursues him.

Pursuing Goals vs. Pursuing Women

• Late nights spent watching Netflix and eating junk food with her or going on dates just for her can cause a woman to lose respect for you.

• The best kind of relationship dynamic is one where a man is pursuing his goals and a woman is pursuing him.

• This dynamic is rare, but it's where the woman will chase you while you focus on other things.

• You don't need to be a supermodel or ultra-rich to achieve this dynamic. Even broke guys or physically unattractive men can have this effect on women.

Building the Character of a Man

• There are many factors that contribute to building up the character of a man who is so focused on something else that women can't help but focus on him.

• These factors include personality, identity, game, money, lifestyle, athleticism, and physical appearance.

• To achieve the best relationship dynamic where your goals get better while she supports you, you have to become the rare man who embodies these qualities.

Conclusion

• Achieving this relationship dynamic requires hard work even when you don't feel like it.