La sexualidad de las personas adultas mayores | Patricia Kelly | TEDxUNAMAcatlán

La sexualidad de las personas adultas mayores | Patricia Kelly | TEDxUNAMAcatlán

The Subversive Nature of Aging and Sexuality

Introduction to the Topic

  • The speaker expresses surprise at the societal trend of diminishing rights for older individuals, indicating a need for discussion on this issue.
  • A personal anecdote highlights a negative perception of aging, where young people dismiss older adults' existence humorously yet harshly.

The Overlooked Sexuality of Older Adults

  • The speaker emphasizes that many younger individuals forget their parents and grandparents have active sexual lives, challenging common misconceptions about aging.
  • Discusses the interconnectedness of active aging with sexuality, rights, and health; asserting that these elements are crucial for understanding the aging process.

Positive Perspectives on Aging

  • Introduces a metaphor comparing aging to a caterpillar transforming into a butterfly, suggesting that there is beauty in the process despite societal fears and negativity surrounding it.
  • Encourages reframing perceptions about aging by recognizing its potential positives rather than focusing solely on fears and stereotypes.

Gendered Perspectives on Aging

Societal Pressures on Women

  • Highlights how women face early societal pressures regarding menopause, often leading to negative connotations associated with aging.
  • Critiques language used around menopause as derogatory, illustrating how society's views can be harmful to women's self-perception during this natural life stage.

Natural Processes vs. Stigmas

  • Compares experiences of menstruation and menopause to illustrate how both are natural processes but are treated differently in terms of stigma.
  • Suggests that while women may feel pressured by societal expectations during these transitions, they should embrace them as part of their identity rather than viewing them negatively.

Myths Surrounding Older Adults' Sexuality

Misconceptions About Sexual Activity

  • Addresses the taboo surrounding older adults' sexuality, questioning whether menopause or erectile dysfunction truly ends sexual activity for these individuals.
  • Challenges myths suggesting that only adolescents experience fulfilling sexuality; argues against stereotypes that label older adults as incapable or uninterested in sexual relationships.

Health Concerns and Sexuality

Understanding Sexuality Beyond Reproduction

The Misconception of Sexuality

  • There exists a limiting belief, often supported by strong institutions, that sexuality is solely for reproduction. This notion raises questions about the broader purpose of sexual expression.
  • Religious leaders play a significant role in perpetuating the idea that sexuality should only serve reproductive purposes, labeling any deviation as sinful.

Aging and Sexuality

  • Medical professionals sometimes reinforce negative perceptions of aging by suggesting that individuals should cease pursuing sexual activity after a certain age, leading to feelings of inadequacy.
  • Many people over 60 are forgetting their human rights and sexual rights, which include the right to love and be loved, regardless of age.

Desire and Acceptance

  • Individuals have the right to express their sexual preferences and desires at any age; however, societal pressures can lead to guilt over these natural feelings.
  • There's a misconception that enjoyment is exclusive to youth; this belief neglects the fact that desire persists throughout life.

Life After 40: A New Perspective

  • Life continues beyond 40 or 60 years old; age does not limit one's ability to enjoy life or maintain creativity.
  • While physical changes occur with aging, they do not equate to a loss of interest in sexuality. Instead, one’s sexual interests may evolve but remain present.

Embracing Change in Sexuality

  • Aging brings physical transformations that can affect self-image and acceptance; reconciling with these changes is crucial for maintaining a healthy view on sexuality.
  • Aging itself is not an illness; while health challenges may arise, they do not inherently diminish one's capacity for sexual expression or enjoyment.

Challenging Ageist Beliefs

  • Negative beliefs about aging can shape experiences; if one anticipates an unpleasant old age due to societal narratives, it may become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Understanding Aging and Sexuality

The Role of Time and Experience in Aging

  • In old age, two significant allies emerge: time and experience. The speaker emphasizes that the accumulated experiences throughout life provide a unique perspective on aging.
  • With age, physical changes lead to a slower pace in life, allowing for more enjoyment of intimate moments such as kisses, caresses, and affectionate words.
  • The speaker highlights the importance of approaching intimacy differently in later years, whether with a partner or through self-exploration like autoerotism.

Importance of Healthy Relationships

  • A fulfilling partnership is crucial; being with someone who shares mutual affection is emphasized over long-term relationships lacking communication or connection.
  • The absence of romantic scenes featuring older adults in media reflects societal misconceptions about aging; changing this narrative can alter perceptions of one's own aging process.

Continuing Sexual Education in Later Life

  • As individuals age, it’s essential to continue sexual education due to various changes that occur during this stage of life.
  • Sexuality in older age should focus on giving and receiving pleasure and affection, contributing positively to self-esteem and body image.

Final Thoughts on Aging and Eroticism

Video description

En esta divertida plática, la educadora sexual Patricia Kelly aborda un tema tabú: sexualidad en adultos mayores. Los adultos mayores tienen dos aliados: la experiencia y el tiempo. La experiencia te ayuda a saber lo que le gusta a tu cuerpo, y el tiempo te ayuda a disfrutar más del erotismo y del autoerotismo. Licenciatura en Periodismo y Comunicación Colectiva de la UNAM. Locutora certificada, cuenta también con estudios y certificaciones en Educación Sexual, Sexualidad, Codependencia y Familia, Geriatría y Gerontología, Trastornos Mentales y Alcoholismo y otras adicciones. Tiene más de 40 años de carrera en la radio, donde creó el primer programa dedicado a la sexualidad humana, Prohibido Tocar que se estrenó en 1986; actualmente encabeza el programa Habla con Ellas, en la XEB del Instituto Mexicano de la Radio, un espacio para hablar y crear una cultura del envejecimiento activo y saludable; y 30 años de carrera televisiva, participando en plataformas como Canal 11, IMEVISIÓN, TvUNAM, CNI o TE-VE-DE-MENTE, entre otras. Tiene dos libros publicados: Mujeres Grandes y Salud Sexual para Todos. Ha dictado cursos y conferencias en diversos foros e instituciones educativas de nuestro país, y su trabajo le ha valido casi una decena de premios y reconocimientos de diversos organismos nacionales. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at http://ted.com/tedx