10 Toxic Tactics of the Female Covert Narcissist
Introduction
In this video, Lise Leblanc, a therapist and master life coach practitioner, discusses 10 toxic tactics used by female covert narcissists during the idealization and devaluation cycle of a relationship.
The Devaluation Stage
During the devaluation stage, the narcissist projects negative emotions towards their true self onto their partner. This is a defense mechanism to keep others from recognizing their discarded and rejected self. Narcissists lack self-awareness and take no responsibility for their abusive behavior.
Projection of Negative Emotions
- Devaluation is a projection and discharge of negative emotions that the narcissist has towards their true self.
- Narcissists release negative emotions on their partner as a defense mechanism to keep them from getting close or recognizing their discarded and rejected self.
Lack of Self-Awareness
- Narcissists lack self-awareness and take zero responsibility for their abusive behavior.
10 Toxic Tactics of Female Covert Narcissists
The female covert narcissist uses various tactics to dominate and control her partner during the idealization and devaluation cycle.
Entrusting Vulnerable Information Early On
- The female covert narcissist entrusts her partner with vulnerable information early on in the relationship.
- After the love bombing stage ends, she accuses her partner of doing things to make her feel insecure or unsafe.
- She sends strong messages that if her partner wants the good version of her back, he must prove himself worthy of her trust and love.
Passive Aggressive Behavior
- The female covert narcissist is super passive aggressive and creates arguments out of thin air by accusing her partner of being negative or in a bad mood.
Gaslighting
- The female covert narcissist uses gaslighting to make her partner doubt his own memory, perception, or sanity.
Triangulation
- The female covert narcissist uses triangulation to create jealousy and competition between her partner and others.
Conclusion
It's important to recognize the signs of a toxic partner, especially when it involves covert narcissism. This content is for informational purposes only and not intended to replace professional support or services.
Recognizing Toxic Partners
- It's important to recognize the signs of a toxic partner, especially when it involves covert narcissism.
- Narcissists lack empathy, have an inflated sense of self-importance, and use others for their own gain.
- If you suspect that you are in a relationship with a toxic partner, seek professional support or services.
Signs of a Female Covert Narcissist
This section describes the signs of a female covert narcissist and how they can affect relationships.
Signs of a Female Covert Narcissist
- She is defensive and dismissive when you try to talk about something important or bothering you.
- She is careless, impatient, and reckless with your emotions. She will use your fears or past traumas against you during arguments.
- You cannot win with her no matter what you say or do. For example, if you go for a walk to cool off during an argument, she will be angrier because she sees it as running away without trying to resolve things.
- She compares you and your relationship to others, making you feel unworthy and unappreciated.
- She grades your performance in the relationship, leaving you feeling like you're on thin ice always nitpicking at you criticizing and putting down your efforts.
- You cannot win at this game; it is a no-win situation 100% of the time.
- Any boundaries or rules that you have will be disregarded while she needs to know and control everything that you do.
- She questions not only what but how you do things as though you can't do anything right. You are treated as completely incompetent.
Conclusion
This section highlights some common traits of female covert narcissists that can make relationships difficult. It's essential to recognize these signs early on so that one can avoid getting stuck in their long game.
The Dangers of Narcissistic Abuse
In this section, the speaker discusses the dangers of being in a relationship with a narcissist and how it can lead to a loss of self-worth and self-respect.
The Effects of Narcissistic Abuse
- Overtime, being in a relationship with a narcissist can strip away one's self-worth and self-respect.
- Victims may constantly adjust themselves to try to please their partner and feel like they are doing something wrong.
- This can lead to feeling like a shell of oneself and even seeing oneself as the monster that the narcissist paints them out to be.
- Victims may feel like they are completely unraveling mentally and emotionally.
Recognizing Toxic Tactics
- It is important for victims to recognize toxic tactics and predictable patterns of abuse.
- Victims may become like a "narcissist puppy dog," completely dominated and broken down psychologically.
- It is important for victims to reflect on whether their partner is getting better or if the relationship is becoming more toxic.