97. Rick Gets Some Old School Teaching From The Dry Creek Wrangler, Dewayne Noel

Name: 97. Rick Gets Some Old School Teaching From The Dry Creek Wrangler, Dewayne Noel
Uploaded: 2023-12-01T21:45:06.000Z
Duration: 3 h 16 min 17 s

Warriors Way Mindset with Dwayne Null

Introduction to Dwayne Null and Dry Creek Motivation

Rick introduces himself as the creator of the Warriors Way mindset and welcomes Dwayne Null, highlighting his impressive presence.

Dwayne discusses the origins of his YouTube channel, which initially aimed to provide horsemanship advice for aspiring cowboys and create a legacy for his grandchildren.

The channel exceeded expectations, leading to significant viewer engagement and requests for a school focused on cowboying skills.

Growth of the School

Due to overwhelming feedback, Dwayne and his wife established a school that has now completed its second year and is fully booked for the third year.

The growth of this initiative has been organic, reflecting genuine interest in cowboy culture and education.

Core Values for Today's Society

Dwayne emphasizes the need for people to "chill out," suggesting that many approach discussions—be it politics or religion—as battles rather than conversations.

He advises young people to ease their stress levels, noting that while one cannot change external realities, they can control their reactions.

Returning to Basics

Key values such as hard work, honesty, and kindness are highlighted as essential traits that society seems to have lost touch with.

Dwayne encourages individuals to return to these foundational principles instead of getting caught up in emotional responses.

Managing Emotional Responses

Addressing how easily people get offended today, he suggests reframing perspectives by not taking things personally.

He discusses masculinity responsibilities: men should focus on self-improvement not just for personal gain but also to better serve those around them.

Selflessness Over Self-Centeredness

Working out or improving oneself should be about being able to support others rather than purely self-serving goals.

Dwayne shares his personal experience of withdrawing from social situations when they become irritating in order to maintain calmness.

Joy Through Service

He reflects on Christian teachings about joy being found through serving others rather than prioritizing oneself.

This perspective challenges common notions about self-help by emphasizing community over individualism.

Understanding the Impact of Self-Centeredness on Happiness

The Role of Selfishness in Happiness

The speaker asserts that happy people are not self-centered or selfish, suggesting a correlation between happiness and altruism.

References to "me-ism" as a modern addiction where individuals seek power and attention, detracting from serving others.

Attention-Seeking Behavior

The speaker discusses how gaining attention from strangers can shift one's intentions towards seeking more attention rather than genuine service.

Highlights the moral compromises some make for attention, leading to difficulties in maintaining authenticity and values.

Personal Reflection on Life Experiences

At 56 years old, the speaker reflects on their life experiences, acknowledging personal weaknesses and failures that shaped their understanding of self.

Despite receiving compliments online, the speaker feels misunderstood by those who do not see their true self.

Societal Trends and Individual Growth

Observations about societal glamorization of selfishness even among those trying to improve themselves; motivations often remain self-serving.

Discusses how initial intentions to serve others can become corrupted by external validation through fitness journeys or public recognition.

Lessons Learned from Life's Failures

The speaker shares insights gained from living multiple lives filled with diverse experiences across nine countries.

Emphasizes that every failure is a learning opportunity that contributes to personal growth and resilience.

Courage in Decision-Making

Encourages taking risks ("jump off that cliff") as essential for gaining courage and making impactful decisions.

Expresses concern for individuals who settle into monotonous careers without exploring broader life experiences, advocating for a richer engagement with life.

Embracing Fear and Taking Risks

The Importance of Taking Chances

Life is about taking chances, facing challenges, and pushing through obstacles. Embrace the journey to discover what lies ahead, even if it may be daunting.

Understanding Failure and Courage

Failure is a stepping stone to success; it teaches valuable lessons and builds courage for making tough decisions. Taking risks can lead to personal growth.

Confronting Fear

Fear is a natural response that can paralyze individuals. Acknowledging fear while still moving forward is essential for overcoming obstacles.

Real-Life Examples of Courage

Two young men left stable jobs in search of fulfillment, demonstrating that courage can lead to life-changing experiences despite initial fears.

Balancing Fear with Safety

While fear can prevent reckless decisions, it also serves as a guide for safety. Recognizing when fear is justified helps maintain balance in decision-making.

Navigating the Balance Between Courage and Foolishness

The Nature of Courage vs. Foolishness

Courage involves understanding potential risks but proceeding regardless; foolishness ignores risks entirely. Distinguishing between the two is crucial for sound judgment.

The Role of Balance in Decision-Making

Maintaining balance between caution and recklessness prevents poor choices. Being overly cautious or too daring can lead to negative outcomes.

Personal Experiences with Risk Assessment

The speaker shares personal health challenges that inform their risk assessment when working with horses, emphasizing careful consideration before taking action.

Evaluating Worst-case Scenarios

Assessing worst-case scenarios helps determine whether one can handle potential consequences. This evaluation aids in making informed decisions about risks taken.

Encouraging Calculated Risks

Young people should evaluate their options realistically when pursuing dreams, understanding that failure isn't the end but an opportunity for growth and learning.

Understanding Balance and Wisdom in Life

The Complexity of Balance

The concept of "balance" is intricate, often challenging for individuals to grasp, especially when considering various aspects like mind, heart, body, soul, wisdom versus experience.

Personal experiences shape one's understanding of balance; what works for one person may not apply to another due to differing life circumstances and experiences.

Personal Experiences with Balance

The speaker shares insights about their family dynamics, emphasizing that each child's journey toward finding balance is unique and influenced by their individual experiences.

Acknowledges the inevitability of falling out of balance as part of growth; younger individuals will face challenges that contribute to their understanding of balance over time.

Learning Through Failure

Emphasizes that true learning comes from experiencing failure; one cannot determine their own balance solely by observing others' falls.

Highlights the importance of overcoming the fear of failure as it fosters personal growth and resilience.

Childhood Lessons on Falling

Compares adult struggles with childhood lessons on walking; children learn through trial and error, which mirrors adult experiences in facing life's challenges.

Discusses how a child's first fall while learning to walk can be perceived as traumatic but is a necessary step in their development.

Perspective on Trauma and Growth

Encourages reframing personal trauma within a broader context; what feels overwhelming at one moment may seem minor compared to future challenges or historical events.

Suggests that people often cling to their trauma as the most significant experience without recognizing the potential for perspective shift and growth.

Guiding Others Through Challenges

Questions arise about how to help others transition from a victim mentality towards empowerment; exploring methods for facilitating this change is crucial.

Seeks strategies for guiding individuals through difficult experiences—whether through exposure to challenges or conversations aimed at processing trauma effectively.

Horse Training and the Importance of Fun

The Challenge of Training a Stubborn Horse

A trainer recounts a past experience with a particularly stubborn horse, described as "the biggest pain in the neck" he had ever dealt with.

The horse displayed dominant behavior and resistance to training, making it difficult for the trainer to establish control.

After 30 days of training, the trainer successfully got the horse to ride but noted that it still resisted commands from its owner.

Overcoming Fear and Emphasizing Enjoyment

During a riding session with the horse's owner, the trainer observed signs of fear in her when she attempted to saddle her horse.

The trainer encouraged her to confront her fears by stepping up her assertiveness towards the horse, emphasizing that it was merely bluffing.

He highlighted that riding should be fun; when asked about their motivation for getting into horses, she admitted she wasn't having any fun at all.

Rediscovering Joy in Activities

The trainer stressed that if an activity isn't enjoyable, there’s no reason to continue; he suggested selling the horse if they couldn't find joy together.

He reflected on how people often lose sight of fun in various aspects of life—marriage, parenting, and work—which leads to dissatisfaction.

The Distinction Between Happiness and Joy

Discussing happiness versus joy, he explained that happiness is often tied to circumstances while joy is more stable and enduring.

He argued that seeking happiness can lead to emotional fluctuations based on external factors rather than cultivating lasting joy within relationships or activities.

Maintaining Joy Amidst Challenges

The speaker emphasized maintaining a joyful perspective regardless of daily ups and downs in marriage or other commitments.

He concluded by illustrating how focusing on joy helps navigate life's challenges without losing sight of what truly matters.

Understanding Joy vs. Happiness in Relationships and Faith

The Role of Childlike Wonder in Relationships

The speaker reflects on the importance of maintaining a sense of childlike wonder, as demonstrated by buying a sled for his wife, which symbolizes joy and spontaneity.

Initially, this childlike wonder attracted him to his future wife but later became a source of frustration after marriage; recognizing its value transformed his perspective.

Distinguishing Between Happiness and Joy

The speaker emphasizes that happiness is often circumstantial while joy represents an overall mindset that should be cultivated.

True joy is found in relationships with others rather than in selfish pursuits, highlighting the fleeting nature of happiness.

Navigating Struggles with Faith

Discussing faith struggles, the speaker offers advice on prioritizing God over self-interest to find deeper meaning and connection.

He notes that many people question their purpose ("Why am I here?") and suggests that understanding one's role in relation to God can provide clarity.

Purpose Through Service

The speaker believes life’s purpose is not about personal gain but about glorifying God through service to others.

He argues that serving others leads to fulfillment and purpose, contrasting it with selfishness which leads to anxiety.

Addressing Selfishness as a Human Disease

The discussion shifts towards the idea that selfishness is a fundamental human issue leading to unhappiness; finding purpose through service combats this disease.

Emphasizing the need for men (and individuals generally) to have direction, he asserts that true peace comes from serving others rather than focusing solely on oneself.

Raising Children: The Balance of Discipline and Forgiveness

Wisdom for Stepparents and Fathers

Raising children is a complex task that requires wisdom and balance, especially for stepparents. It's important to remember key points to navigate this role effectively.

A metaphor for parenting: "Raising children is like holding a wet bar soap." Too much pressure leads to loss, while too little results in slipping away. Balance is crucial.

As children grow, the balance between discipline and allowing mistakes must shift. Parents need courage to let kids make their own choices while guiding them when necessary.

The concept of balance evolves from ages 2 to 16; parents must adjust their approach as children mature. This adaptability is essential for effective parenting.

Reflecting on personal experiences, the speaker acknowledges past strictness as a father but emphasizes the importance of evolving one's parenting style over time.

Generational Perspectives on Parenting

The speaker humorously contrasts Old Testament-style strictness with New Testament grace in parenting, highlighting how perspectives change with age and experience.

There’s often a generational gap in perceptions of discipline; older siblings may feel they were treated more harshly than younger ones due to evolving parental approaches.

Forgiveness plays a significant role in parenting; fathers should forgive themselves for past mistakes as they reflect on their children's upbringing.

The Importance of Self-Forgiveness

Acknowledging past shortcomings allows parents to grow. It’s vital for fathers to forgive themselves just as they would forgive others involved in their lives.

Understanding that previous generations did their best can help break cycles of blame and foster forgiveness towards one’s own parents’ methods.

Navigating Expectations vs. Reality

Many parents aim to do better than their own parents but may swing too far in the opposite direction, creating new challenges rather than solving old ones.

This pendulum effect can lead to new mistakes while trying not to repeat old ones; recognizing this cycle is crucial for growth as a parent.

Challenges of Forgiveness

Forgiving oneself can be particularly challenging because it involves both giving and receiving forgiveness internally, making it a complex emotional process.

Acceptance of forgiveness from others does not always translate into self-forgiveness; many struggle with reconciling external forgiveness with internal feelings of guilt or inadequacy.

Understanding Forgiveness and Honesty in Relationships

The Challenge of Accepting Forgiveness

Many individuals struggle with feelings of guilt or shame regarding their past actions, making it difficult to accept forgiveness from others.

People often find it easier to forgive others than to forgive themselves, leading to a cycle of self-condemnation despite external forgiveness.

Genuine change in behavior can facilitate self-forgiveness; recognizing personal growth helps individuals let go of past mistakes.

Effort and Growth in Self-Forgiveness

Acknowledging one's efforts to improve can ease the burden of self-forgiveness, as individuals see themselves as transformed rather than defined by past actions.

There is a tendency for people to seek grace without putting in the necessary work towards personal growth, which complicates the forgiveness process.

The Nature of Truth and Lies

The speaker discusses the complexity surrounding honesty, noting that everyone withholds information at times for various reasons, including protecting oneself or others.

Withholding information is not necessarily lying; context matters when evaluating honesty versus dishonesty.

Distinguishing Between Dishonesty and Omission

Situations arise where withholding certain truths does not equate to lying; it's essential to differentiate between intentional deceit and omission based on context.

An example illustrates how discussing one topic (food) does not obligate full disclosure about other unrelated matters (companionship).

Teaching Children About Truth

When addressing sensitive topics with children, it's important to gauge their readiness for certain information rather than providing complete transparency immediately.

The speaker emphasizes that while he avoids outright lies with his children, he also refrains from sharing all truths until they are developmentally ready.

Understanding Trust and Honesty in Relationships

The Slippery Slope of Sharing Information

The discussion begins with the complexity of sharing information, emphasizing the wisdom required to gauge what someone can handle.

Acknowledgment of trust issues arises when considering honesty versus omission, highlighting the difficulty in knowing how much to share without causing harm.

Foundations of True Character

The conversation shifts to defining the foundation of a true man, focusing on key attributes such as hard work, honesty, service, and balance.

The importance of intention is discussed; whether omissions serve others or oneself significantly impacts trustworthiness.

Navigating Difficult Conversations

An exploration into personal experiences reveals that even pure intentions can lead to complications in communication within relationships.

Personal anecdotes illustrate how withholding certain truths can be protective but may also lead to misunderstandings about trust.

Balancing Truth and Delivery

Real-life examples are shared regarding sensitive topics where honesty must be balanced with care for emotional well-being.

Humor is introduced as a tool for delivering potentially hurtful truths more gently, showcasing the role of delivery in effective communication.

Gender Dynamics and Service Mindset

Discussion transitions into gender roles and expectations within relationships, particularly around cooking and service.

Insights reveal that both partners often seek mutual enjoyment from their contributions, indicating a shared mindset focused on serving each other’s needs.

Masculine and Feminine Energy Dynamics

The conversation touches on societal pressures related to masculine and feminine roles amidst hustle culture.

A controversial stance is presented regarding personal identity and perceptions surrounding masculinity.

Understanding Masculinity and Feminine Energy

Perspectives on Attraction and Gender Roles

The speaker identifies as a masculine man, expressing no desire to marry another man or a dominant woman, emphasizing personal preferences in attraction.

He acknowledges the feminine touch brought into his home by his wife and daughter, highlighting the balance they create in their family dynamics.

The speaker articulates that he does not need a strong woman to balance him out since he feels complete in his masculine energy; instead, he seeks the nurturing qualities of femininity.

He discusses societal judgments regarding attraction, asserting that personal preferences should not be subject to external validation or shame.

The speaker reflects on the unique energy brought by women in his household, particularly during festive seasons, which contrasts with his own interests.

Societal Trends and Their Implications

Noting a shift in demographics, he points out that there are now more women over 30 without children than under 30 without children—a historical first.

This trend is attributed to women pursuing careers and new opportunities but may come at the cost of traditional feminine roles such as motherhood.

He emphasizes that men seeking partners often prefer warmth and nurturing rather than competition or dominance from women.

The speaker advocates for traditional gender roles where men handle heavy responsibilities while women provide emotional support through nurturing actions like cooking.

Personal Philosophy on Gender Dynamics

Acknowledging diverse choices among women today, he maintains that those who embody toughness do not affect his worldview unless they disrupt it.

He asserts confidence in his authority within his space, stating that individuals must adhere to established rules while present in his environment.

The speaker expresses indifference towards others' lifestyles as long as they respect boundaries within his domain.

He believes everyone should live authentically without imposing their beliefs on others while maintaining personal integrity within their own lives.

Ultimately, he concludes that each individual is accountable for their own life choices and should focus on self-governance rather than trying to control others.

Acceptance and Understanding in Relationships

The Importance of Boundaries

The speaker emphasizes the need for personal boundaries, stating that while individuals can live their lives freely, they should not interfere with others' lives or responsibilities.

Acceptance is highlighted as a two-way street; one must respect others' lifestyles while expecting the same in return to foster mutual understanding.

Love and Judgment

The speaker expresses indifference towards titles or labels people choose, focusing instead on helping others improve without judgment.

A reference to biblical teachings underscores the importance of love over condemnation, suggesting that one's role is to love rather than judge.

Roles and Responsibilities

The analogy of a courtroom illustrates that there is only one judge (God), emphasizing that it’s not anyone's place to assume this role over others.

The speaker acknowledges their own limitations, stating they have enough personal issues to address without taking on the responsibility of judging others.

Free Will and Choices

Free will is presented as a significant aspect of life; individuals are encouraged to make their own choices rather than being dictated by external pressures.

The speaker believes it's essential for spiritual leaders to communicate God's guidelines but ultimately leave individual decisions up to each person.

Connection Through Choice

Emphasizing free will further, the speaker notes that making choices allows for personal growth and development into adulthood.

There’s an acknowledgment that using God as an excuse for negative behavior contradicts His teachings; thus, individuals must be accountable for their actions.

Encouragement Over Condemnation

Instead of shaming others for differing beliefs or actions, opportunities for connection should be prioritized.

The speaker shares insights from horsemanship as a metaphor for guidance—showing options without imposing strict rules fosters independence in decision-making.

Empowerment Through Options

By presenting various choices rather than mandates, young men are encouraged to grow into responsible adults through self-determination.

Observations about industry professionals highlight the distinction between those genuinely invested in client success versus those merely participating superficially.

Understanding Personal Transformation

The Journey of Self-Discovery

The speaker emphasizes the importance of guiding individuals towards their goals rather than dictating actions, highlighting that there are multiple paths to success.

Acknowledges the feeling of missing out on experiences, suggesting a desire for shared moments and connections in life.

Embracing Change

The speaker reflects on their past struggles with anger and unlikability, recognizing the need for personal change to improve relationships with family.

Discusses removing negative influences from life and finding peace through simple pleasures like smoking a cigar, which allows for reflection and calmness.

Defiance Against Societal Norms

Expresses a sense of defiance against societal expectations regarding masculinity, using personal choices as a form of self-expression.

Highlights how engaging in activities deemed unacceptable can provide an opportunity to slow down and think critically before reacting.

The Value of Writing

Writing as a Tool for Clarity

Stresses the significance of writing in understanding oneself better; encourages men to use notebooks as tools for self-exploration.

Compares chaotic thoughts to a storm, explaining that writing helps isolate ideas from confusion, allowing for clearer judgment.

Overcoming Mental Barriers

Suggests that many people confuse overthinking with under-deciding; emphasizes the need to separate thoughts to facilitate decision-making.

Encourages addressing rhetorical questions seriously; urges individuals to reflect on their motivations behind actions instead of accepting them at face value.

Understanding the Core Issues in Horse Training and Personal Development

The Initial Encounter with a Horse

A horse is unloaded into a small arena but displays signs of anxiety, such as running around and resisting being caught.

Despite being broke to ride, the horse struggles with standing still for saddling and shows disobedience when ridden, indicating deeper issues.

Identifying Underlying Problems

The speaker emphasizes that multiple behavioral issues stem from one core problem, which could be lack of respect, fear, ignorance due to inadequate training, or overfeeding.

Overfeeding can lead to hyperactivity in horses, similar to how excessive sugar affects children’s behavior; this analogy highlights the importance of identifying root causes rather than symptoms.

Simplifying Complex Issues

The speaker suggests that life becomes complicated when we fail to address fundamental problems; understanding the basic issue simplifies solutions.

By focusing on one main question instead of numerous symptoms, one can effectively tackle underlying issues in both horses and people.

Drawing Parallels Between Horses and People

Just like horses exhibit behavioral problems due to unaddressed core issues, people often struggle with unresolved emotional trauma or loss that manifests as various symptoms.

Addressing these root causes allows individuals to process feelings and beliefs tied to their identity more effectively.

The Importance of Root Cause Analysis

An analogy is made about a tree whose acidic sap burns if touched; merely cutting off branches (symptoms) does not solve the problem unless the root cause is addressed.

To prevent recurring issues (limbs growing back), it’s crucial to identify and eliminate the root cause rather than just treating surface-level symptoms.

Questioning Assumptions for Deeper Understanding

Discoveries arise from questioning established answers rather than simply addressing questions; this approach leads to uncovering deeper truths about personal challenges.

Many individuals complicate their lives through distractions and deflections instead of confronting core issues directly.

Conclusion: Embracing Simplicity in Problem-Solving

The discussion concludes by highlighting how societal distractions contribute to an inability to identify core problems; recognizing this can lead to better mental health practices.

Acknowledging that many people are overwhelmed by superficial concerns reinforces the need for focused attention on foundational issues for effective resolution.

How to Connect with Dry Creek Wranglers

Opportunities for Future Classes

The speaker expresses enthusiasm about serving in future classes and encourages listeners to find ways to connect with the school for upcoming opportunities.

There is a call to action for those interested in signing up for future classes, indicating a desire to expand outreach and engagement.

Resources and Contact Information

The official website for Dry Creek Wranglers is provided: www.drycreekwranglers.com, which contains information about the school, contact details, and registration options.

The speaker mentions reaching 900,000 subscribers on their YouTube channel, highlighting the growth of their online presence.

YouTube Channel Insights

The main YouTube channel is identified as "Dry Creek Wrangler," where most of their content originates. This platform serves as a key resource for followers.

A secondary channel called "Dry Creek Mama" is mentioned, focusing on content from a women's perspective, although it has fewer posts compared to the main channel.

Engagement Encouragement

Listeners are encouraged to engage with the channels by subscribing and interacting with the content. This reflects an emphasis on community building around their platforms.

The speaker thanks Dwayne for his participation in the discussion, suggesting a positive collaborative atmosphere that may lead to future interactions or discussions.