How to DETACH From Someone - The Secret You Need to Understand Relationships
How to Detach from an X or Someone You're in a Relationship With
In this video, the speaker discusses how to detach from someone you need distance from because they are not healthy for you. The speaker covers four things that need to be understood about detaching and explains what happens at the subconscious level of mind.
Understanding Detachment
- Consciously choosing to detach is not enough because our subconscious mind governs our decisions and choices.
- Properly detaching means healing the voids that exist when we attach to someone and rely on them to get our needs met.
- Leveraging the mechanics of how the subconscious mind works is crucial for detaching.
Healing Voids
- Getting our needs met in new forms is essential for properly detaching.
- We have different subconscious needs that govern us, such as wanting to feel seen, heard, emotionally connected, physically connected, reassured, valued, validated, wanted, protected or cared for.
- Detaching means learning to heal voids by finding ways to fill up what was taken away.
Traits They Brought Into Our Lives
- We have to find ways to express traits that were brought into our lives by people we detach from.
- By filling up what was taken away from us by not being there anymore with new traits and characteristics we don't miss them as much.
The speaker mentions a course available for those who want a deeper understanding of detachment.
Detaching from Old Stories
In this section, the speaker discusses how our subconscious mind tries to maintain a connection with someone by attaching to old stories. The speaker suggests making a list of these stories and looking at the costs of staying connected to that person.
Detaching from Old Stories
- Our subconscious mind attaches to old stories as a way of maintaining a connection with someone.
- Make a list of these stories and look at the costs of staying connected to that person.
- Look for the other side of those stories and write out the benefits of setting yourself free.
- Disconnecting from old stories is essential in detaching in a healthy way.
Integrated Attachment Theory Training
In this section, the speaker announces that integrated attachment theory training is back. This training is for anyone who wants to become a relationship coach or expand their toolkit as a counselor, therapist, or coach.
Integrated Attachment Theory Training
- Integrated attachment theory training is back.
- This training is for anyone who wants to become a relationship coach or expand their toolkit as a counselor, therapist, or coach.
- The program helps individuals understand their own attachment patterns and those of others in their lives.
- Click on the link below to learn more about this program before seats run out.
Detaching from Fantasy
In this section, the speaker talks about detaching from fantasy. People often get attached to the fantasy world they have created with someone rather than who that person really was. Writing out what that person was like in reality can help reconcile fantasy versus reality.
Detaching from Fantasy
- People often get attached to the fantasy world they have created with someone rather than who that person really was.
- Writing out what that person was like in reality can help reconcile fantasy versus reality.
- Detaching from the fantasy of what could have been is essential in detaching in a healthy way.
- Reconciling the two can help you get really present and detach from those old stories about how you should have done things differently.
Grieving the Person, Not the Fantasy
In this section, the speaker discusses how people often attach more to the fantasy of the future with someone than who that person really was. Writing out on a page who that person was in reality and reconciling it with who they were in your fantasy world can help you grieve for the person, not just for your fantasy.
Grieving the Person, Not the Fantasy
- People often attach more to the fantasy of the future with someone than who that person really was.
- Writing out on a page who that person was in reality and reconciling it with who they were in your fantasy world can help you grieve for the person, not just for your fantasy.
- Detaching from needs and traits is important when detaching from someone.
- Arguing with past stories is unproductive since you cannot control them.
Overview of Daily Content
In this section, the speaker provides an overview of the daily content available on their platform.
Available Topics
- The speaker covers a wide range of topics in their courses, including integrated attachment theory, subconscious mind, healing, creating change, and improving relationships.
- The content provided is high-level but goes deeper in the courses themselves.
- Daily content is posted every day for subscribers to learn more.
Subscription
- Viewers are encouraged to subscribe to access all the available content.
- The speaker expresses gratitude for viewership and hopes that people will consider subscribing.