How Nords Have "The Talk"

Introduction

The speaker introduces the topic of absinthe and a fairy named Tinker Hell.

Absinthe and Tinker Hell

• The speaker mentions that they could give absinthe, but it's banned.

• They mention a fairy named Tinker Hell who visits people when they drink absinthe.

Bargains with Mary from Hell

The speaker talks about making deals with Mary from hell and how Tinker Hell is different from other fairies.

Deals with Mary from Hell

• The speaker talks about making deals with Mary from hell.

• They mention that Tinker Hell tries to make weird deals with people.

Tinker Hell vs Other Fairies

• The speaker mentions that there are many fairies running around.

• They explain that Tinker Hell is a different kind of fairy.

Awkward Situations

The speaker discusses awkward situations that can arise after drinking absinthe and making deals with fairies.

Ending Up in the Wrong Bed

• The speaker mentions ending up in the wrong bed after drinking absinthe.

• They ask what's wrong with ending up in the wrong bed, to which the other person responds by asking if it's just some guy you met that day.

Explaining Where Babies Come From

The speaker attempts to explain where babies come from to someone who doesn't know.

Age of Listener

• The other person asks how old the speaker is.

• The speaker responds that they are 18.

Birds and Bees for Nords

• The speaker mentions the "birds and bees" talk.

• They ask if the other person has heard of "the birds and the bees for Nords."

• The other person doesn't respond.

Foxes and Wolves

• The speaker asks if the other person has heard of "the foxes and the wolves."

• The other person responds that they haven't.

Making Babies

• The speaker asks if the other person knows where babies come from.

• They respond that a bird drops them off, to which the speaker says it's problematic.

• The speaker attempts to explain how babies are made by talking about a man and woman who like each other spending time together, getting married, and eventually having children.

Required Ingredients

The conversation turns to making babies in bed, but there's a problem with not having the required ingredients.

Making Babies in Bed

• The speaker explains that in order to have children, you don't just get them from a bird dropping them off. You have to make them in bed.

• They clarify that you need certain ingredients to make babies.

Interruption by Davin

• Davin interrupts the conversation.

The Hazards of Having Children

In this section, the speakers discuss the repercussions of having children and advise against it.

Having Children is a Terrible Experience

• People may tell you that having children is a blessing, but once you have them, you're locked into a relationship with them.

• Children are bad and not worth it. They poop everywhere, pee everywhere, and can drown if not watched properly.

You Don't Need Parents to Turn Out Fine

• Anya turned out fine despite not having parents to raise her.

• You learn your best experiences when you're on your own.

How to Make Babies?

In this section, the speakers discuss how to make babies and caution against it.

The Importance of Finding the Right Person

• It's important to be with the right person at the right time; otherwise, you'll regret it for life.

• They need David's approval first before making babies.

Caution Against Making Babies

• If possible, avoid making babies altogether as they are hard work.

• At some point in life, after being married for a long time away from now yet, one can have children with the right person.

How to Make a Baby

In this section, the conversation revolves around how babies are made and the responsibility that comes with having them.

Finding a Boy You Like

• When you find a boy that you like and you're married, it's time to make a little yarl or shield maiden.

• You go up to your bed, and then basically, you're going to...and eventually, nine months later, a little yarl or shield maiden will come out.

Responsibility of Having Babies

• It's important to be careful because sometimes the boy will have something that if he doesn't have it, then it might as well just avoid it.

• You don't have to be afraid of babies; you need to have them when you're ready for them.

• Having babies is a lot of responsibility.

Avoiding Pregnancy

• There are ways to do "that stuff" without having a baby.

• Doing "that stuff" with someone you love can be enjoyable and also not produce a baby.

• But you're gonna have to make him use protection.

Final Thoughts

• The bleep can hurt but it gets better. Don't ever fake anything.