Every night, I felt my husband’s eyes on me while I slept. Until one night…
The Start of a Troubling Journey
Hattie's Disturbing Experience
- Hattie recounts a chilling experience where her husband, Otis, would watch her sleep every night for seven months at 2:47 AM. This behavior led to a significant revelation that changed her life forever.
Introduction to Hattie Mae Ellington
- Hattie introduces herself as 91 years old, born in 1934 in Macon, Georgia. She emphasizes the truthfulness of her story and invites viewers to verify it with her family.
Request for Engagement
- Hattie asks viewers to like the video and subscribe to "Grandma's Journal," expressing her desire for others to hear her story and reassuring women that they are not alone in their struggles.
A Marriage Arranged by Family
Early Life and Marriage
- Hattie shares details about marrying Otis Washington on October 15, 1955, at the age of 21. Their marriage was arranged by their families who believed they were a good match due to their fathers' connections as church deacons.
Description of Wedding Day
- The wedding took place in a Baptist Church with a large celebration featuring food and gospel music. Hattie wore a lace dress belonging to her grandmother, highlighting the significance of tradition in her life.
Life on the Farm
Living Conditions
- After marriage, they moved into a simple three-room house on a small farm given by Otis's father. The living conditions included an outhouse bathroom and kerosene lamps instead of electricity, reflecting the hardships of rural life during that era.
Daily Responsibilities
- Hattie describes her daily tasks which included cooking on a wood stove and washing clothes by hand while Otis worked in the fields growing crops like corn and collard greens. This division of labor was typical for couples at that time.
Motherhood Amidst Routine
Birth of Daughters
- Over the years, Hattie gave birth to three daughters: Ruth (1957), Ruby (1959), and Pearl (1962). Each birth had its challenges but brought immense joy despite difficult circumstances surrounding them. Ruth was calm; Ruby was lively; Pearl was sharp-witted yet petite.
Relationship Dynamics with Otis
- Despite having three daughters whom she cherished deeply, Hattie's relationship with Otis lacked affection or emotional connection; he never expressed love or provided gifts, leading her to question if this was normal for marriages during that time period.
Reflections on Marriage
Acceptance of Life's Routine
- For thirteen years, their marriage followed a monotonous routine without major joys or problems—Hattie accepted this reality as part of life while recognizing she wasn't entirely happy either but felt grateful for what she had: food on the table and shelter over their heads.
A Turning Point Approaches
- January 1968 marked an important moment when weather conditions improved after heavy rains at year-end; this change coincided with shifts within their family dynamics as their daughters grew older during school breaks—a foreshadowing hinting at upcoming events that would alter everything further down the line.
A Night of Unease
A Normal Day Turns Strange
- The narrator recalls a typical day on January 16, 1968, filled with mundane tasks like making coffee and looking after the children. She mentions mending a dress in the afternoon.
- Dinner consisted of grits and greens with leftover cured ham, followed by an early bedtime for the children while she and Otis spent time together in the living room.
The Start of Disturbing Events
- In the middle of the night, she wakes up feeling watched and sees Otis's silhouette standing by her side of the bed, which causes her heart to race. She initially fears it is a burglar.
- Despite her fear, she realizes it is Otis but remains unable to speak or move as he silently watches her before returning to his side of the bed without explanation. This leaves her anxious throughout the night.
Repeated Nightly Incidents
- The following morning, she pretends nothing happened but observes Otis closely for any signs of change; however, he appears normal during breakfast. She questions whether it was just a dream or if he had been sleepwalking.
- This unsettling occurrence repeats every night at exactly 2:47 AM for several nights in a row, leading her to feel increasingly desperate and afraid to sleep as she anticipates his presence beside her bed each time.
Growing Anxiety and Isolation
- As weeks pass into months (February through July), she becomes more anxious about Otis's behavior while struggling with sleeplessness and weight loss; even their daughter Ruth notices something is wrong with her mother.
- The narrator contemplates various explanations for Otis's nightly behavior—initially considering sleepwalking but dismissing it due to its consistency—and begins fearing that he may be suffering from a mental illness similar to someone else they knew who had gone mad.
Seeking Answers Amidst Isolation
- With no nearby neighbors or means of communication (like a telephone), she feels trapped in trying to understand what is happening with Otis and considers reaching out for help but finds herself isolated in their rural setting.
The Struggles of Silence and Fear
The Burden of Isolation
- The narrator reflects on the difficulty of sharing her experiences, fearing judgment for revealing that her husband watches her sleep at night.
- She describes her mother's traditional views on marriage, emphasizing endurance in silence, which discourages open communication about personal struggles.
- Attempts to confide in neighbors about marital issues are met with light-hearted responses, highlighting the stigma around discussing serious problems in a small community.
Physical and Emotional Toll
- The narrator's deteriorating health is evident as she loses weight and feels unrecognizable due to stress and lack of sleep.
- Her children notice changes in her behavior; Ruth expresses concern over her mother's well-being, indicating the impact of the situation on family dynamics.
- Ruby's unusual quietness and Pearl's clinginess suggest that the children are sensing an underlying tension within the household.
Growing Fear and Anxiety
- The husband's nightly behavior instills fear in the narrator as she recalls stories of men harming their wives while they sleep.
- She begins to experience insomnia, lying awake at night filled with dread about what might happen when he approaches her bed.
A Night of Terror
- One night, she pretends to be asleep to observe his actions; his prolonged presence near her heightens her anxiety as she contemplates his intentions.
- Despite feeling terrified by his close proximity, he ultimately does not harm her but leaves without explanation.
Consequences of Stress
- Following a sleepless night filled with fear, she becomes physically weak during daily activities, showcasing how emotional distress manifests into physical ailments.
- Ruth’s concern leads to a moment where the narrator almost reveals the truth about their father but refrains for fear of burdening her child with adult worries.
Declining Health and Denial
- The narrator acknowledges significant weight loss due to stress but avoids seeking medical help out of fear that it won't address the root problem—her husband’s behavior.
- She recognizes that ignoring these issues only exacerbates them; however, financial constraints prevent any action from being taken.
Desperate Measures
- In July, she attempts to stay awake all night out of desperation to confront Otis but ultimately fails due to exhaustion.
- This failure leads her to question whether Otis waits for moments when she's asleep before acting upon his unsettling impulses.
Fear and Suspicion in Domestic Life
Growing Fear of Otis
- The narrator expresses fear regarding Otis's behavior, suspecting he is hiding something from her. She observes his interactions with others, particularly girls, looking for signs of change.
- A Sunday church service leads the narrator to contemplate the idea that Otis may be influenced by evil forces, reflecting her upbringing and beliefs about temptation and demons.
Concern for Ruby's Well-being
- The narrator becomes increasingly worried about her daughter Ruby, who appears to be losing weight and acting strangely. Despite Ruby's assurances of eating well, the mother's intuition tells her otherwise.
- After noticing Ruby's distress and physical changes, the mother tries to comfort her but senses deeper issues at play beyond just a stomach ache. This moment marks a shift in focus from Otis to her daughter's well-being.
Nighttime Vigilance
- The mother reflects on her daughters' behaviors: Ruth is concerned for her, Ruby is fearful and thin, while Pearl clings to her for comfort. This highlights the family's growing tension under Otis’s presence.
- Determined to uncover what Otis is doing during his nightly visits at 2:47 AM, she resolves to feign sleep effectively so she can listen without being detected. This decision signifies a turning point in her agency against fear.
Preparing for Discovery
- On August 12, 1968, she prepares mentally for the confrontation with truth about Otis’s actions that night; she feels both anxious and resolute about needing answers despite potential consequences.
- As she lies awake before midnight amidst unsettling dreams filled with anxiety over family safety and stability, anticipation builds as she counts down minutes until 2:47 AM approaches again. Her determination grows stronger as time passes slowly in silence.
The Tension Builds
- Lying still in bed while trying not to alert Otis showcases the psychological strain she's under; every sound heightens her awareness of their precarious situation together in this domestic space filled with dread rather than comfort. She questions whether he is truly asleep or waiting like herself—this uncertainty amplifies tension within their relationship dynamic further still as they share a bed yet remain worlds apart emotionally.
The Weight of a Promise
The Tension of Silence
- The narrator describes a heavy silence in the house, only broken by the wind and their own breathing, indicating a tense atmosphere.
- They attempt to calm themselves while feeling their heart race, fearing it might be heard by another person present.
A Moment of Anticipation
- As the other person moves, the narrator remains still and pretends to be asleep, heightening the suspense of the moment.
- The sound of careful footsteps on the wooden floor suggests caution and fear from both parties involved.
Confession and Regret
- The man kneels beside the bed and begins to whisper apologies, revealing his deep remorse for an undisclosed promise he made.
- He expresses desperation over a significant debt owed to Mr. Thorn, which creates tension regarding his intentions towards Ruby, their daughter.
A Disturbing Proposal
- The man reveals that he promised Ruby's hand in marriage to Mr. Thorn when she turns fifteen as payment for his gambling debt, causing horror in the narrator.
- This revelation leads to feelings of rage and helplessness within the narrator as they grapple with this betrayal against their child’s future.
Emotional Turmoil
- The narrator reflects on how they have been blind to Ruby's distress and realizes that her behavior was linked to her knowledge about her father's promise.
- They express profound sorrow over having sold their daughter's future due to fear and cowardice while contemplating what lies ahead for Ruby at such a young age.
Fear and Determination
A Mother's Resolve
- The narrator reflects on her overwhelming fear, realizing she had overlooked her daughter's fear as well. She vows to protect her daughter at all costs, despite external pressures from Otis and Silas Thorne.
- As dawn breaks, the narrator prepares for the day while contemplating how to escape their current situation. She feels trapped without money or a clear plan.
- Thoughts of returning to her sick mother in Macon or seeking help from her sister Edda in Atlanta cross her mind, highlighting her desperation and lack of resources.
Morning Routine and Family Dynamics
- The daughters wake up, with Ruby's knowing gaze indicating an unspoken understanding between them about the gravity of their situation. This moment emphasizes the bond between mother and child amidst turmoil.
- Despite trying to maintain normalcy by discussing everyday topics with the girls, tension builds as she prepares them for a trip to Auntie Edda's house under the guise of fun while hiding deeper intentions.
Urgent Departure Plans
- The narrator insists that Ruth and the girls will spend time at Auntie Edda’s house, revealing a sense of urgency in needing to "settle some things." This decision is made against Otis's pale demeanor, suggesting he understands the implications.
- Packing quickly for their departure signifies both preparation for escape and emotional weight as she hugs each daughter tightly before they leave, cherishing what may be their last moments together for a while.
Confrontation with Otis
- Upon returning home alone after sending off the girls, an intense silence fills the room between her and Otis; both understand that their relationship has irrevocably changed due to his actions. This moment captures deep emotional conflict without words being exchanged.
- Otis begins to cry when confronted about his betrayal regarding their daughter Ruby; this marks a pivotal shift where past grievances surface alongside raw emotions from both parties involved in this familial crisis.
Unraveling Secrets
- The narrator demands clarity from Otis about his gambling debts that led him to promise their daughter Ruby to another man; this revelation underscores themes of desperation and betrayal within relationships marked by financial strain.
- As Otis recounts his gambling history—highlighting how he lost significant savings—the narrative reveals layers of sacrifice made by the narrator through hard work that contrasts sharply with Otis's reckless behavior, emphasizing gender roles and economic struggles within family dynamics.
The Consequences of Desperation
The Debt and Its Implications
- The speaker recounts losing everything in a single night due to gambling, leading to desperation and borrowing money from Mr. Thorn.
- Mr. Thorn imposes a one-week deadline for repayment of the $3,000 debt, threatening to take away the family’s land and home if not settled.
- Mr. Thorn proposes marriage to the speaker's daughter Ruby as a means to forgive the debt, revealing his intentions after observing her at church.
The Moral Dilemma
- The speaker expresses horror at the thought of marrying off his young daughter, emphasizing her age and innocence.
- Under threat from Mr. Thorn regarding his family's safety, the speaker reluctantly agrees to promise Ruby's hand in marriage when she turns fifteen.
Regret and Realization
- The speaker acknowledges his grave mistake and sleepless nights stemming from guilt over promising his daughter's future under duress.
- He recalls signing a document that binds Ruby’s future without her consent or knowledge.
Taking Action
- Concerned about Ruby's awareness of the situation, he decides to act immediately by drafting a statement canceling the promise made under threat.
- Despite doubts about its effectiveness due to Mr. Thorn holding the original document, he insists on taking action against this injustice.
Confrontation with Mr. Thorn
- The speaker prepares to confront Mr. Thorn directly about canceling the marriage promise while asserting that their daughter is not an object for trade.
- After walking towards Silas Thorn's plantation, he encounters Mr. Banks who offers him a ride; they arrive at a large estate indicative of wealth and power.
This structured summary captures key moments from the transcript while providing timestamps for easy reference back to specific parts of the discussion.
Confrontation at the Plantation
Hattie's Arrival and Intentions
- Hattie arrives at Silas Thorn's house without an appointment, identifying herself as Otis Washington's wife. She feels judged by her appearance but remains determined.
- Upon meeting Silas, he feigns honor in receiving her but is surprised by her refusal to enter his home, indicating she has come to undo a prior arrangement regarding her daughter.
The Cancellation of the Marriage Arrangement
- Hattie presents a cancellation note from her husband, asserting that their daughter is not merchandise and will not marry Silas. This provokes anger in Silas, who dismisses the note's validity.
- Hattie firmly states that if Silas attempts to take their daughter, she will protect her at all costs, emphasizing her role as a mother despite being perceived as powerless.
Escalating Tensions
- The confrontation escalates with Silas demanding repayment of a debt owed by Otis. Hattie counters that this debt should not involve their daughter and threatens to expose him publicly.
- Hattie's threat to reveal Silas’s intentions towards a child intensifies the situation; she vows to create a scandal that could ruin his reputation.
Defiance and Resolution
- Despite intimidation tactics from Silas, Hattie stands firm in her resolve to protect her family. She declares that any further actions against them will be met with public outcry.
- After leaving the plantation, Hattie reflects on the emotional toll of the confrontation while walking home under the sun.
Emotional Breakdown and Decision for Change
- Overwhelmed by fear and desperation for both herself and her daughters, Hattie breaks down emotionally under a pecan tree before gathering strength to continue home.
- Upon returning home late at night, she confronts Otis about his failure to protect their family and decides it’s time for drastic action.
Departure from Home
- In preparation for leaving with their daughters, Hattie packs up essentials while expressing determination not to stay in an unsafe environment due to Otis's negligence.
- Despite Otis pleading for forgiveness and another chance, Hattie asserts that he had multiple opportunities which he squandered.
Seeking Refuge
- On August 12th, 1968, armed only with minimal belongings and cash, Hattie leaves home seeking safety for herself and her daughters.
- She reaches Mr. Banks' house asking for help getting to the bus station; he assists without question upon seeing her distress.
Journey Towards Freedom
- The narrative concludes with Hattie's arrival in Atlanta early on August 13th; she seeks refuge with her sister Eta after planning to retrieve her daughters from the bus depot.
A New Beginning: Seeking Refuge
Arrival at Edda's House
- The narrator describes returning to Edda's tidy home, which consists of two bedrooms, a living room, and a kitchen. She lives there with her husband Robert and their two children, John and Mary.
- The narrator shares her story with Edda over coffee and biscuits, detailing the traumatic events that led her to seek refuge, including the time of 2:47 AM when everything changed.
Emotional Reactions
- Edda's reaction shifts from shock to anger upon hearing the narrator’s story. She expresses strong disapproval of the narrator's past situation.
- The narrator resolves not to return to her previous life, stating her intention to stay until she can support herself and her daughters. Edda offers unwavering support.
Family Bonds
- The emotional reunion occurs as Ruby runs to hug the narrator tightly, signifying understanding and love amidst distress.
- All three daughters embrace their mother in a moment filled with relief and shared sorrow; they cling together as a family unit during this challenging time.
Life at Edda's
- As days turn into weeks and months pass by, the family adapts to their new living situation in Edda’s house where the narrator sleeps on a mattress in the living room while caring for her daughters.