The Skill of Building Relationships

In this video, the speaker talks about the skill of building relationships and how it is a key factor in achieving success. He shares seven habits that have helped Cliff Weitzman, co-founder and CEO of Speechify, achieve ridiculous levels of success.

Sending Cold Emails

• Send as many cold emails to people you admire and want to get to know.

• Create a Google sheet of the 100 people who know about a topic the most and message every single one on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn or email.

• A decent cold email has a ridiculous return on investment provided you know how to do it well.

Consuming Content

• Consume all content from someone you admire and want to connect with.

• Almost anyone with good ideas is sharing them online these days.

• Listening to podcasts or audiobooks can help consume content quickly.

Providing Value

• Provide value before asking for anything in return.

• Find ways to help people without expecting anything back.

• People are more likely to respond positively when they see that you genuinely care about their work.

Following Up

• Follow up after sending an initial message or email.

• Persistence pays off when trying to build relationships.

• Be respectful and mindful of people's time when following up.

Being Authentic

• Be authentic when reaching out to people.

• Don't try too hard or be fake just because you want something from someone else.

• People can tell when you're not being genuine.

Building a Network

• Build a network of people who share similar interests and goals.

• Attend events or join groups where you can meet like-minded individuals.

• Networking is about building relationships, not just collecting business cards.

Giving Back

• Give back to your community or industry in some way.

• Volunteering or mentoring can help build relationships and provide value to others.

• Helping others can also lead to unexpected opportunities.

Getting Comfortable with Asking People to Hang Out

Cliff shares his experience of getting comfortable with asking people to hang out and how it helped him get to know more people in college. He also addresses the concern that this may be easier for extroverts.

Building Social Skills

• Cliff spent a lot of time in the dining hall making sure he was sitting with different groups of people.

• He would talk to everybody at each table, getting to know as many people as he could.

• By doing this systematically every year, he got to know 60 of his freshman class in the first two months.

Overcoming Shyness

• While some people have an easier time interacting with strangers, no one is physically unable to do so.

• Even those who have social anxiety can build the skill of interacting with strangers through systematic desensitization over time and putting in effort.

Bonding Over Ambition or Vulnerability

Cliff discusses how small talk has its place but ultimately bonding happens over shared vulnerability or ambition. He also explains why knowing what a character wants and why they can't get it is important for storytelling.

The Power of Shared Experiences

• Very little actual bonding happens over small talk.

• We bond with people through shared vulnerability, ambition, or experiences.

Story Structure

• A good story involves knowing what a character wants and why they can't get it.

Building Relationships and Writing Thank You Notes

In this section, the speaker discusses the importance of building relationships with people by bonding over ambition or vulnerability. He also talks about the benefits of writing thank you notes and shares examples of how he has applied this habit in his own life.

Building Relationships

• Form relationships with people by bonding over ambition or vulnerability.

• Be interested in the person and ask about their goals and challenges to spark conversation.

Writing Thank You Notes

• Write thank you notes to people you know personally or don't know personally.

• Psychologists have shown that writing thank you notes has benefits for both the sender and recipient.

• Example: Cliff sent a random thank you note to the founder of Audible, who helped him overcome dyslexia.

• Instead of scrolling on social media as a form of procrastination, scroll through your contacts list or recent text messages and send a nice thank you message to someone who catches your eye.

Putting Good Energy into the World

In this section, the speaker talks about putting good energy into the world without expecting anything in return. He shares insights from "The Go-Giver" book and gives examples of how putting out value into the world can lead to good things happening.

Putting Good Energy into the World

• Put out value into the world without expecting anything in return.

• When you put out good energy, loads of value comes back to you.

• Examples: making videos on YouTube for free, working for someone you admire without expecting payment.

Creating Opportunities and Working in Your Zone of Genius

In this section, the speaker discusses two habits that can help individuals succeed in their careers. The first habit is to put value into the world without expecting anything in return, which can lead to opportunities. The second habit is to work within one's zone of genius, where they can thrive and excel.

Putting Value into the World

• Referring others to good work can lead to opportunities.

• Putting value into the world without expecting anything in return can lead to multiple returns.

Working Within Your Zone of Genius

• Work should feel like play rather than work.

• Individuals should identify their zone of genius and focus on working within it.

• The speaker's zone of genius is real-time live high-pressure environments.

• Clearing one's calendar for opportunities that align with their zone of genius is important.

• It is easier to be better than 99% of people when working within one's zone of genius because it feels like play.

Figuring Out Your Zone of Genius

In this section, the speaker expands on how individuals can figure out their own zone of genius by identifying what feels like play rather than work.

Identifying Your Zone of Genius

• Individuals need to figure out what area they personally thrive and flourish in.

• For some people, organizing things or keeping finances meticulously organized feels like play.

• Competitive attitudes towards the world are easier when doing something that feels like play because you cannot compete with someone who is having fun.

Following Your Passion vs. Working Within Your Zone of Genius

In this section, the speaker discusses why following your passion may not be the best advice for succeeding in the world of work.

Following Your Passion

• The video "Why Following Your Passion is Terrible Advice" explains why following your passion may not lead to success in the world of work.

Working Within Your Zone of Genius

• Working within one's zone of genius can lead to success in the world of work.

• The interview with Cliff Weitzman expands on this topic.