How To Become Approach Oriented Rather Than Avoid Oriented | Dr. Benjamin Hardy

Approach vs Avoid Motivation

In this section, the speaker discusses how motivation is often categorized as either approach or avoid-oriented. He explains that approach-oriented individuals are focused on achieving their goals and willing to take risks, while avoid-oriented individuals are more focused on avoiding failure and taking fewer risks.

Two Categories of Motivation

• Psychology categorizes motivation into two categories: approach and avoid.

• Approach-oriented individuals have clear goals, focus on rewards, and are willing to take action and risks.

• Avoid-oriented individuals focus more on avoiding failure than achieving success.

Differences Between Approach and Avoid-Oriented Individuals

• Approach-oriented people want to advance their current position by taking risks, while avoid-oriented people try to maintain their current position by avoiding failure.

• Being approach-oriented means having a clear vision of your future self and being willing to take risks to achieve it. On the other hand, being avoid-oriented means being overly conservative about taking risks.

Importance of Approaching Your Past

• To turn any form of trauma into post-traumatic growth or transformation, you have to be approach oriented towards your own past. This involves focusing on an event with deliberate rumination in order to turn it into lessons for transformation.

• If you're avoiding your past or measuring yourself against ideals, you'll always be in a gap mindset where you wish things were different.

Principles for Becoming More Approach Oriented

In this section, the speaker shares some principles for becoming more approach oriented as a person. He emphasizes the importance of taking action, being willing to adjust your aims as you get more information, and not being overly committed to your current self.

Principles for Becoming More Approach Oriented

• Clarify your future self and have clear goals.

• Take radical imperfect action by using the 80 rule, which means that 80% effort gets results while 100% is still thinking about it.

• Don't be overly committed to your current self or position. Be willing to take smart calculated risks regularly in order to better position your future self.

The Importance of Being Approach Oriented

In this section, the speaker discusses the importance of being approach oriented and how it can lead to success in life.

Being Avoid Oriented vs. Approach Oriented

• The speaker describes how being avoid oriented can prevent individuals from having hard conversations and avoiding their past and future.

• Tim Ferriss' quote is mentioned, stating that a person's success in life comes down to the awkward conversations they're willing to have.

• The speaker explains that being approach oriented is key to having peak experiences outside of one's comfort zone where things are less predictable.

Courage and Transformation

• Prediction errors are discussed as a result of trying something new, which leads to a better understanding of the world.

• Courage is defined as the willingness to try something that could fail.

• Being approach oriented allows for transformation and growth, leading to eventual success.