Chapter 6 Passages Birth, Marriage, and Death
Understanding Customs Surrounding Birth, Marriage, and Death
Overview of Cultural Customs
- Customs related to birth, marriage, and death vary significantly across cultures, often leaving foreigners bewildered.
- Many customs are deeply ingrained in local culture; locals may not question their origins or practices.
- The United States showcases a blend of various ethnic traditions alongside a general American culture that evolves with immigration.
Birth Traditions
- The birth of a baby is celebrated through various traditions; one common practice is the baby shower.
- Baby showers are typically organized by friends or relatives and can be surprises or planned events where gifts for the newborn are given.
- Traditionally female-centric, men's participation in baby showers is increasing as societal norms evolve.
- Modern couples often attend birthing classes together, with many fathers now present during delivery—a shift from past practices where men waited outside.
Religious Services After Birth
- Following birth, many families hold religious services (e.g., baptism for Christians), even if they aren't particularly religious themselves.
Marriage Customs
- Marriage customs vary widely; traditionally, men asked for permission to marry from the bride's father but this is less common today.
- Engagement rings remain customary; however, women may initiate discussions about marriage more frequently now.
- Wedding ceremonies can range from simple gatherings to elaborate celebrations funded primarily by the bride's family.
Wedding Showers and Gifts
- Similar to baby showers, wedding showers involve giving gifts to help the couple set up their new home.
Civil and Religious Wedding Ceremonies
Overview of Wedding Ceremonies
- Couples can choose to marry in a civil ceremony at a government building, but this is not required if they opt for a religious ceremony.
- Ministers and rabbis have the legal authority to officiate weddings, meaning both civil and religious ceremonies are not necessary.
Wedding Traditions
- A notable wedding tradition involves the bride carrying or wearing "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue," which is checked before the ceremony.
- Superstitions include the belief that it brings bad luck for the groom to see the bride in her dress before the wedding.
Post-Ceremony Customs
- After the ceremony, guests traditionally throw rice at the couple as a symbol of fertility; however, some venues now recommend alternatives like rose petals due to safety concerns.
Customs Surrounding Death
Funeral Decisions
- Customs regarding death vary widely; decisions must be made about whether to hold a funeral in a church or funeral home.
- Families must also decide on cremation versus burial; memorial services are held if cremation occurs instead of traditional funerals.
Wake and Funeral Services
- Wakes are common prior to funerals where families receive condolences from friends and relatives.
- During funerals, religious leaders often provide comfort through speeches, while eulogies highlight positive memories of the deceased.
Attending Funerals
- Notices for funeral services may appear in newspapers; attendance is generally open without personal invitations.
- Sympathy cards are typically sent by acquaintances who wish to express their condolences.
Attire for Weddings and Funerals
Traditional Dress Codes
- Traditionally, brides wear white dresses while guests can wear various colors except white.
- While black was once mandatory attire for funerals as an expression of grief, this custom has become less strictly observed over time.
Cultural Variations